Silenced By the Night
by MediumDripKlaine
Summary: Shortly after graduation, Chris decided he needed a break from Clovis. So one night he packed a suitcase and left for San Francisco, hoping to find a moment of peace. What he found instead was so much more. Over the next few days he discovered what it was like to experience a foreign city with a stranger by his side, and more importantly, what it felt like to fall in love.
1. Chapter 1

**Hey! This story sort of came out of nowhere. I don't usually write CrissColfer because I prefer to read it, but it was actually quite fun to write :)**

**I've finished writing it, but since it ended up being 23,000+ words, I'm uploading it in four parts.**

**The title is from Keane's song.**

* * *

_Thump thump_

_Thump thump_

_Thump thump_

Chris listened to his heart as it beat unsteadily in his chest, the throbbing sensation against his ribs becoming almost too much for him to bear. The images in his mind of what happened just a few hours ago, of what happened every day of his miserable life, still fresh, the emotional wounds still open and untouched. There were scars on his heart as well as the physical reminders of each locker he had been shoved into.

He reached over to his nightstand and flipped on the lamp, illuminating the room with a hazy yellowish glow. It made things eerie and the unsettling feeling in the pit of his stomach grew.

Chris had never had a problem sleeping through the night, at least not when he was younger. But as the years passed by and each Clovis student grew into the person they were to be, the teasing began. Teasing turned into hurtful taunting. Taunting turned into full-forced bullying, and bullying turned from emotional to physical. By the time he reached high school, he had become submissive to the words thrown at him and the shoves he got. It wasn't that he didn't stand up for himself; it was just that he didn't see a reason to care anymore.

Graduation had come and gone, and what Chris had once thought would be a ticket out of his hard life in Clovis was no more than a much-too-long ceremony and a piece of paper saying he had at least accomplished more than the numerous losers who dropped out before making it through their senior year.

Now, every time Chris closed his eyes, he was forced to see the past four years of his life. He never had nightmares per say, but in order to have a nightmare you had to actually fall asleep. Chris found it nearly impossible to do so, at least willingly. His eyes would fight his mind and exhaustion would eventually take over, sending him into a deep sleep. It was then that he was finally safe. Safe from his tormentors. Safe from rejection. Safe from depression. Safe from the feeling of absolute terror and failure that seemed to consume his every thought.

Chris was unhappy, to put it lightly. He didn't have a single person he could consider a friend, and the person he was closet to was his younger sister; someone who didn't see the world in quite the same light as he did. And he kept it that way. Hannah was innocent, joyful, naïve even. She was unaware of the hurt in Chris' life and while it was good for one to be aware of the cruelty in the world, Chris liked that Hannah wasn't able to judge others and match someone with a specific stereotype.

Perhaps if there were more people as kind and accepting as her, he wouldn't be laying in bed staring at his ceiling at 12:48 in the morning, wondering what his life had come to and what the point in going on was. He found himself wondering what it would be like if he just disappeared during the night. If he ended his life, would anyone even notice? No one would lose a friend. He wouldn't have to worry about his future anymore. He wouldn't have to live with regret and fear.

He turned his head to the side, and that's when he noticed the small, black frame on his nightstand. It was a picture of him and Hannah, one his mom had taken the previous summer. He was convinced that the joy on his sister's face could cure even the most insufferable of depressions. And it did for the brief moments he saw it.

It was then, staring at the picture and thinking about the family who raised him to be who he was that he realized he could never leave; at least not in a way that prevented him from ever coming back. However, there was one thing he could do, and no matter how scary it would be for him to go through with it and the panic that was sure to run through his parents' minds when they woke up the next morning, he knew he had to do it.

Which is why Chris found himself throwing clothes into the biggest suitcase he had, tossing his toiletries on top and gathering the stash of cash he had hidden in the back of his closet. His family is the reason he tip-toed into the kitchen and pulled out a small sheet of paper to write a note to his mom. Despite all of the bad things in his life telling him to just give up, Tim, Karyn, and Hannah were the reason he slipped out the front door, keys in hand and suitcase following close behind, and climbed into his car.

Not even a minute later he backed out of the driveway and began making his way down the street, alone, without a destination in mind, but finally feeling free.

XXX

Chris was on the road for a little over five minutes before making a decision about his destination. He was heading north because south was Los Angeles and he knew he wouldn't be able to go to LA. The city would be full of reminders of every audition he didn't get. He would have to walk down the streets knowing the people around him were living their dream. They had the life that _he_ wanted. Putting himself in that type of environment would only send him into a deeper depression.

The minute he took exit 57A he slouched back in his seat and allowed his rigid shoulders to relax into a more comfortable position. There wasn't one specific aspect about the city he was headed towards that made him choose it. Perhaps deep down, he felt like it was the one place he would belong; somewhere he could be himself for a week or two without feeling the disapproving looks of those around him.

He kept the radio off as he drove, and the silence surrounding him felt peaceful for the first time in his life. He was alone, but not for long. In a matter of a few hours, he would be in San Francisco.

XXX

By the time he arrived in San Francisco the clock on his dash read "6:09," and the bright numbers were an instant reminder of the people sleeping all around him. He probably should have thought things through a little better; maybe he should have left around five in order to have some place to go once he arrived in the city. However, he was there, and nothing could be done about it.

He parked his car on the side of the road, making sure to take in his surroundings so he could actually find his way back, and slowly stepped out onto the sidewalk.

To be honest, Chris was terrified. He was in an unfamiliar city with nowhere to go, and the sun hadn't begun peaking over the horizon just yet. He couldn't help the fear that bubbled up inside of him when he passed an ally or turned a corner. The city would be covered in a pink and orange glow within the next hour, but at the time, the only source of light came from the lamp posts lining the streets.

He made his way down the sidewalk and walked past various shops and restaurants, all of which were still closed from the previous day. He was unsure what he was looking for in particular, but he knew once he saw it, he would just _know_. He had brought enough money with him to cover the fees at a crappy hotel, and the rest of his expenses he would take out of his savings. Chris knew he wouldn't be able to afford a comfortable hotel, but that wasn't the point. He was finally out of the town that had consumed his happiness for eighteen years, and he was determined not to let anything bring him down.

Or so he thought until he felt the first raindrop splash onto his face and run down his pale cheek. Inwardly cursing the dark grey clouds above him, he began running. He was blocks away from his car by now which sent him into an instant panic. He frantically looked around at his surroundings as the rain picked up and his t-shirt and jeans became saturated with the murky rain water.

That's when he saw a dim light through a window a couple shops down. He walked a little quicker, trying his best to stay under the poor excuse of a shelter that was the canvas awning hanging above his head.

When Chris arrived at the shop he saw a younger man behind the counter with a guitar stretched out before him. Chris could barely see his face for all of the curls on top of his head, and any other time, he might have taken a few minutes to admire just how beautiful the boy was. But he didn't have a few minutes.

He began to frantically knock on the window, trying his best to get the man's attention and hoped he would be kind enough to take pity on Chris. It didn't take long before a pair of hazel eyes met his, and a look of genuine confusion was painted on the man's face. Regardless, he set the guitar down and hustled to the door, unlocking it and swinging it open to let Chris inside.

"Thank you," Chris muttered, a little breathless.

"Dud, you're _wet_," the man pointed out.

Chris looked up at him, wondering if there was some kind of hidden joke behind what he was saying or if he was just plain idiotic. Chris estimated that he couldn't have been more than a few years older than himself.

"If you haven't noticed, water seems to be falling from the sky. It happens occasionally," Chris said, a little more sarcastically than he had intended and he immediately regretted it.

"I'm wounded. You should be a little nicer. I just saved you from Zeus' fury." Chris looked at him like he was the oddest man he'd ever met. "You know, the Greek go-"

"I know what you're talking about," Chris interrupted. "Most of the people I know aren't intelligent enough to come up with a reference like that. I'm sorry. I'm running on little to no sleep. It makes me a tad snappy." Chris shifted awkwardly where he was standing, not sure what he was supposed to do now that he was out of the rain.

He finally looked around the little shop—not that he could see very far due to the racks not-quite-so-strategically placed throughout the store—and noticed it was some kind of music shop. There were stacks and stacks of books spread throughout and finding sheet music stuck between two objects wasn't uncommon. Chris noticed a few musical instruments out of their cases and set randomly around the store. He almost liked how disorganized it all felt, and he couldn't help but to think the shopped reflected that of the personality of the man standing before him.

"I'm Darren," the man finally said with an outstretched hand.

Chris hesitantly took it. "Chris."

"So, Chris." Darren began making his way back to the counter and gestured for Chris to follow. "What brings you wandering through the streets of San Francisco at six in the morning? Boyfriend kick you out?"

Chris' jaw dropped at Darren's assumption, albeit a true one, but before he could speak Darren continued.

"You aren't from around here, are you?" Chris shook his head. "What brings you to the city then?"

_I needed to escape the pain at home_, he thought. "Just a visit. I got here a few minutes ago. I was trying to find a place to stay."

Darren eyed him curiously as he went back to work on the guitar. Chris kept his distance, but casually rummaged through the bowl of one-of-a-kind guitar picks on the counter.

"Any luck so far?"

"No. It started raining before I could get too far."

Darren finished tuning the guitar and set it into its case. "Great. Well, you're visibly shivering, so first of all we need to get you out of those clothes." He stepped out from behind the counter and placed his hands on Chris' shoulder to turn him around. He didn't miss the way Chris flinched or the wince coming from his lips.

"Sorry," he apologized.

"I-it's fine." Chris didn't know why he was so flustered by Darren. He'd grown up around attractive guys, but he couldn't look or touch. But here was Darren, defying both of those rules. Chris had noticed the way he studied him out of the corner of his eye as he finished up with the guitar and even the slight physical contact was something entirely new and unfamiliar to Chris. He wasn't used to anyone being so comfortable with him, especially someone he just met.

Darren dug around in his pocket for his keys and pulled them out. "Come on. Let me just lock the place up and we can head to my house."

"What?" Kurt croaked. He couldn't go to a stranger's house. What if it was a trap? Sure, Darren _looked_ like a nice guy, but there was still something off about him. Chris couldn't put his finger on it, but the way he seemed so _kind_ to Chris was unusual. Chris didn't understand why he was so willing to help out a boy he'd just met minutes earlier. Maybe people in San Francisco were just that way.

"You can't stay in these clothes all day, Chris. You'll catch a cold." He looked around Chris. "Did you being anything with you?"

"Um, I did, b-but it's all in my car about ten blocks south from here."

Darren considered this for a minute before shaking his head. "My house is about four blocks north of here. I'm sure I have something you can wear."

"Darren, I don't-"

But Darren didn't let him finish his sentence. Before Chris knew it, he was being pulled back out into the rain. Darren locked the door behind them and tugged on Chris' hand. The small gesture was familiar to Darren. What he didn't realize was just how foreign it was to Chris. Chris felt his hand catch fire as the warmth of Darren's palm met his own. He couldn't help but to stare down at their joined hands as he ran through the streets behind Darren.

A few minutes later they reached a row of the stereotypical San Francisco Painted Ladies. Darren slowed his pace and turned up a flight of stairs, pausing to make sure Chris made it up carefully. He unlocked the bright red front door and pulled Chris inside and out of the rain.

Darren tossed his keys on a table by the door and led Chris up the stairs to the left. "My parents are gone for the weekend, so I'll use their shower and you can take mine."

"I don't need a shower," Chris said quickly and came to a halt at the top of the stairs.

"Chris, you could use a warm shower." Chris tried to still his heart every time Darren said his name. "I mean, you don't have to if you don't want to. I don't want to make you uncomfortable, but I think it would help." Darren rubbed the back of his neck and Chris almost thought he looked a bit nervous.

"N-no. It's fine. I just don't want to intrude."

Darren's warm smile appeared on his face again. "Don't be silly. My room's just over here," he pointed to a room a couple doors down.

Darren's room was the complete opposite of what Chris had expected to see, but he supposed it fit the little bit of Darren's personality he'd already seen poke through. The walls were painted a dull blue, and posters of various musical groups and movies were hung along the wall. There was a queen-sized bed in the middle of the wall, flanked by two dark oak nightstands. What didn't surprise Chris was the amount of t-shirts strewn across the floor—clean he hoped, but not very likely.

"Sorry about that," Darren picked a pizza box up off of the floor near Chris' feet and set it on the desk. "My brother ordered a pizza last night and passed the leftovers on to me."

Chris just smiled and Darren disappeared into his closet. Chris was almost afraid it would swallow him whole and he would never make it out. However, Darren returned with a pair of jeans (more than likely too short) and a tight-fitted Beatles t-shirt and handed them off to Chris.

"Thank you," Chris said shyly.

Darren grabbed his own clothes and headed to his dresser. "Do you need, um…" he trailed off.

Chris picked up on what he was asking. "What?" Oh, no! I-I'll be fine." He fidgeted with the hem of the shirt. "You have good taste, by the way," Chris added. "I love the Beatles."

Darren pulled a pair of boxers out and shut the drawer. "Yeah?" Chris didn't miss the way his eyes sparkled from the little bit of sunlight finally making its way into the sky.

"Yeah," Chris smiled back.

"Thanks. My ex-girlfriend hated them. Maybe that's why things didn't work out. Anyone who can't appreciate their talent has to be fucking insane."

_Ex-girlfriend._

Chris tried to ignore the way his heart dropped through his chest when Darren said those words. It's not like he expected Darren to be gay anyway.

"Right. Well, you said the shower was…"

"Oh, right. The room across the hall. Towels are in the cabinet behind the door."

"Thank you." Chris made his way out of Darren's room wondering what the hell he'd gotten himself into.

XXX

Once Chris was done with his shower and changed into dry clothes, he followed Darren downstairs. Darren threw their clothes in the dryer and led Chris into the kitchen.

"Are you hungry?" Chris shrugged. "Come on, Chris. You can be honest." Darren pulled two bowls out of the cabinet and set them on the counter before grabbing two spoons and two boxes of cereal.

"To be honest, I'm still trying to figure out why you're doing all of this for me. You don't even know me." Darren pulled a bar stool out and motioned for Chris to sit down.

"I just care, okay?" Darren opened a box of cereal and began pouring the contents into his bowl.

"But _why_? Why do you care about a stranger?"

"I don't know," Darren sighed. And he _didn't_ know. He didn't know why felt so impelled to help Chris out, but there was something gnawing at him, something deep inside his gut telling him that he had to help.

Sensing Darren wasn't going to continue, Chris changed the subject. "Did you just mix Fruity Pebbles with Fruit Loops?" Chris laughed, and he realized that it was the first time something had genuinely made him smile in weeks. Being with Darren seemed easy. It felt as if he'd known him for years rather than an hour.

"Yes, and it's fucking amazing. The strawberry milk makes it even better."

Sure enough, Chris watched as Darren pulled a carton of strawberry milk from the refrigerator and poured it into the rainbow cereal.

"Do you have something a little less… colorful?" Chris wasn't sure he was ready to _literally_ puke rainbows just yet.

"My mom has some of that Kashi shit. Would you like that instead?"

"That would be nice."

Darren hopped down from his stool and pulled another box out of the cabinet, handing it to Chris with a disgusted look on his face. "You're one of those healthy eaters, aren't you?"

"I wouldn't say that, but I stopped eating kids' cereal once I stopped being a kid."

"There's no age limit on that damn box," Darren said sternly, and then added with a smile, "I've checked."

They continued eating for a few minutes in silence before Chris spoke up. "You asked me what I was doing out at six in the morning, but you never told me why you were alone in that shop so early."

Darren shoved a spoonful of cereal into his mouth before answering. Chris had to hold back from cringing at the sight. Darren really was that of a typical young, manner-less man, but Chris somehow found himself attracted to it.

"I have trouble sleeping sometimes. I've never got it diagnosed, but my mom thinks I have mild insomnia. She always tells me my mind never wants to shut up because I insist on doing a million different things at once. Maybe she's right, but I enjoy it."

"At least you're doing something with your life," Chris pointed out.

Darren pointed his spoon towards Chris. "Exactly. I mean, I go to school, and-"

"Where?" Chris interrupted.

"Michigan. If all goes well, I've got one more year left. During the summer I help out at the music shop. My friend's parents own the place, and I helped out a lot when it first opened a few years ago. I know my way around pretty well, so when I can't sleep, I go in and get a few things done. Sometimes I work, but a lot of the time I use the silence to write new songs or play a few tunes."

"You write music?" Chris had to admit that he was impressed. He could write any essay handed to him, an article on anything, a million different fictional stories, but the minute he tried to write a song his mind shut down.

"I'm not saying I write _good_ music, but I've written quite a few songs."

Chris nodded. He found himself doing that quite a bit. He wasn't quite sure what to say around Darren. Darren was as much a mystery to him as the city itself.

"So, where do you plan on staying while you're here?" Darren poured a little bit more cereal in his bowl.

"I can't afford much, so a cheap little motel is probably where I'll end up. Do you have any suggestions?"

"There's always the Palace De Criss."

"The what?" Chris raised an eyebrow.

"Criss. It's my last name. I was saying you're welcome to stay here. We've got a guest room and my parents are always happy to meet new people."

Chris couldn't say he was surprised by the offer given Darren's helpfulness thus far, but he declined anyway. "I couldn't do that. I'll be fine at a hotel or something. Thank you, though."

There it was again. The disappointment on Darren's face. Chris convinced himself that he had imagined it this time as well.

"Well, the offer still stands if you need a place."

"Thank you." Chris finished off the last little bit of cereal in his bowl. "I should probably get going so I can find a place. I really want to thank you for all of this, though. You did far more than I expected of you."

"A-are you sure?"

"Yeah," Chris nodded. "I need to find a room before everything fills up."

"Can I give you my number so you can at least call me to let me know you made it okay? And if you have any questions or get lost, you can feel free to call me."

Chris teased his lip between his teeth, pondering Darren's request. He didn't want to get attached to someone in a city so far away from his home, but wasn't that also kind of the point of coming here? Didn't he want people to get to know him, see him for who he really was and find at least one person who would accept him for everything he was? He wanted to feel free and forget about the pain in his life for one week, and Darren did that for him. Darren made him forget he was a stranger in the city. Darren made him forget about the bruises on his back and the hurtful words engraved into his memory. Darren made him forget everything bad in the world and replaced it with everything that was good.

After taking a minute to think, Chris pulled out his phone and opened up a new contact. "You can just put it in here and I'll call you once I get settled in."

Darren took Chris' phone and began entering his contact information. "Do you promise you'll call me?"

"Yes, Darren, I promise," Chris rolled his eyes.

Darren led him to the door, and Chris almost turned around and told him he'd stay. He didn't _want_ to leave, but he knew he had to. "I'll just… I'll talk to you later I guess."

"Yeah," Darren opened the front door. "I'll talk to you later."

Chris stepped outside and Darren shut the door behind him. The rain had let up and the sun had finally appeared. He was seeing the city for the first time, and the sight before him was beautiful. However, it wasn't nearly as beautiful as the boy on the other side of the door. The one who showed Chris more kindness in one hour than he'd been shown during all four years of high school. Chris took a deep breath and descended the stairs, heading out into the city, and looking for the one thing he came for, not knowing he'd already found him.

XXX

After nearly two hours of searching, wandering up and down the streets of San Francisco, Chris sat down on the uncomfortable, queen-sized bed in the cheapest hotel he could find. It ended up being less than a block from where he originally parked his car, so he kept his spot and hauled his single suitcase inside.

As promised, he reached for his phone to call Darren, but he knew there was another call he had to make first. It was almost 10:00, so he was sure his mom and dad had found out about his impromptu trip by now. He took a deep breath before hitting his house number on speed dial and raising the phone to his ear.

Chris was nervous about how they would react. Although he was eighteen and technically an adult, he knew his parents, especially his mom, would be upset and even a little angry that he'd left, and in some ways, they had every right to be.

The phone call ended up being a little better than he anticipated, but he'd had to promise to call at least once a day to check in and let them know he was okay. Tim and Karyn knew Chris needed a break from Clovis, and they were afraid of what would happen—by Chris' tormenters as well as himself—if they forced him to come home.

Once he hung up with his mom, he searched in his contacts for Darren's name and pressed send. He knew he shouldn't be nervous about making such a simple phone call, but the truth was, he was actually _more_ nervous. He didn't know what it was about Darren that made him so anxious, but there was something about the man that captured his interest. There was something about the way Darren didn't feel like a stranger at all. To Chris, Darren was just _Darren_.

"_Hello?"_ Chris heard Darren's voice on the other line. When he didn't reply, Darren spoke up again. _"Chris, is that you?"_

"Y-yeah. Sorry. Hi."

"_Hi."_

"Hello."

Darren laughed, _"Hello, Flower,"_

"Flower?" Chris was clearly confused.

"_Yeah. From Bambi. You remind me of him."_

"Because I'm gay?" Chris asked, and a wave of astonishment rushed over him when he realized that was the very first time he'd so bluntly expressed his sexuality.

"_No, because you're so cute and bashful. Have you seen that damn skunk? He's got to be the most adorable animal in the fucking world._"

Chris tried to control the butterflies in his stomach that fluttered about once he realized that Darren had indeed called him cute, whether he meant to or not. "O-oh."

Chris heard a loud crash through the phone and Darren yelled, _"Shit! Sorry. Hang on a second."_ He heard the phone being set on what he assumed was a counter and waited for Darren to come back on. About a minute later he heard the voice he was quickly growing to love on the other line again.

"_Sorry about that. I knocked the stand of cleaner over and had to pick everything up before Snicker Doodle got into it."_

"Snicker Doodle?" Chris questioned.

"_Yeah. My cat. She comes to the shop with me every day. She's not too enthusiastic about staying home alone, and now that she's older I have to keep an eye on her."_

Chris leaned back against the headboard of his bed and giggled. "You named your cat Snicker Doodle?"

"_I was eight,"_ Darren stated as if that explained everything.

Chris didn't say anything, just hummed in acknowledgement. "Sorry I'm so awkward," he finally said.

"_Awkward? Never!"_ Darren joked, but his voice held a bit of sincerity.

"I'm the most awkward person you'll ever meet, so the awkwardness of this conversation was inevitable."

"_I beg to differ. I am the _least_ awkward person _you_ will ever meet, so your awkwardness and my lack of balances out to create a mutual easiness in which we can talk."_

"Darren?"

"_Yeah?"_

"Taking a boy you just met home so that you can bathe, clothe, and feed him has the potential to be one of the most awkward experiences one could ever hear of."

"_And was it awkward?"_ Darren asked. Chris could tell he was nervous to hear the answer.

"Strangely, no. You… you're… calming, actually." More than Chris would ever let Darren know, if he was honest.

"_Good. I would hate for your first interaction in the city be one to scar you and scare you from ever coming back."_ Chris heard Darren answer a quick question a customer had, something about a beginner's book for a violin. _"So, you called me."_

"Yes, I did." Chris still wasn't used to how easily he was able to talk to Darren, as if it was something he did every single day.

"_Does this mean you found a place to stay?"_

"Um, yeah. I did. It's not much, but it will get me by while I'm here." Chris looked at the time, noticing it was going on 11:00. He wanted to make the most of his time in the city, so he wanted to get out of the hotel and explore a bit. "Look, as much as I'd love to continue this apparently-not-so-awkward conversation, I need to get going, and you need to do your job."

"_It's not a job. I don't get paid," _Darren retorted.

"Then why the hell do you do it?" Chris wondered how many other ways he could be surprised by Darren.

"_Because I like music._" Chris could practically hear Darren shrugging on the other end of the line. _"Listen, if you go out today and get lost, will you promise to call me? You may be able to save me from these people."_

"You said you liked working there," Chris challenged.

"_I said I liked_ music. _I never said I liked the _customers_."_

Chris rolled his eyes. Somehow he couldn't imagine Darren disliking _anyone_. "Goodbye, Darren."

Chris pressed end with a smile on his face and aimlessly threw his phone in the middle of the bed, wondering what it was about Darren that made him so giddy and uncharacteristically happy.


	2. Chapter 2

**Since this fic is complete, I don't feel like waiting too long in between chapters, so here's chapter two!**

**I hope you enjoy it! :)**

* * *

Chris' first day in San Francisco was spent doing touristy things such as driving across the Golden Gate Bridge, taking snap shots of Alcatraz, and riding in a cable car. He had a good time away from the stress of home, but throughout the day, he couldn't help but feel like something was missing. He walked down the streets, admiring the rainbow banners and friendly strangers passing him by, but whenever he saw something that interested him, he stopped in his tracks and felt empty. He didn't have anyone to experience the city with. Chris didn't think it would matter once he was there because he'd grown up by himself. He never had anyone to talk to or share his opinions with, but for some reason he found himself wishing he did.

After an exhausting day, he curled up in the hotel's bed and pulled the covers up around him. He felt warmer there, safer than when he was at home, but the second he closed his eyes images of men running towards him filled his mind. The amount of alcohol they had consumed slurred their words and it made their hatred towards him escalate.

Chris squeezed his eyes shut and thought about the events of the day in an attempt to forget about everyone who had ever hurt him, but it didn't work. Not for the first time in his life, he'd laid in bed for three hours before giving up on sleep altogether. He knew he _needed_ to sleep because he'd been awake driving the night before, but there wasn't anything he could do to force his mind to calm down.

Well, there was one thing.

Chris hopped out of bed and quickly changed back into a pair of jeans and tennis shoes. He grabbed his keys and cell phone from the night stand and hurried out the door.

It only took Chris a few blocks to realize there wasn't anything open past 1:00 in the morning either, at least not in the part of the city he had resided. More than likely, there were a few bars and a twenty-four hour Wal-Mart in a different part of the city, but the streets around him were peaceful.

Chris walked the ten blocks in silence and subconsciously kept an eye out for anyone who might appear near him. But no one did. By the time he reached the familiar music shop, he hadn't seen more than a stray cat and a little, black bird.

Chris found what he was looking for sitting in a chair in the back corner with a guitar situated on his lap, but this time he allowed himself to stare in awe at the man. He noticed Darren's toned chest and arms—the way his t-shirt fell just right over his muscles—and Chris took some more time to admire his hair. It was funny, really, because he'd never been attracted to guys with darker hair, and curls weren't something he found particularly appealing. However, on Darren, he thought they were perfect.

Chris continued watching for a few minutes as Darren strummed at his guitar, singing something that Chris couldn't quite make out through the glass window separating them. He found himself wondering what Darren's voice sounded like and if it was just as beautiful as the man it was coming from. He figured it was because everything about Darren seemed beautiful.

After spending what he considered to be a minute too long looking at Darren, he quietly knocked on the door, just loud enough to spark Darren's attention and tear him away from the guitar.

Darren's face lit up and he practically ran to the door, fumbling with the lock a bit before getting it open and allowing Chris inside.

"Hi," Darren said, and Chris realized he was breathless—from singing or something else he wasn't sure.

"Hi," Chris replied with a smile and looked away. "I-I couldn't sleep and I figured you might be here."

"Here I am. I started writing a new song tonight and I was just working one of the verses." Darren walked back to the corner and Chris followed close behind.

"Can I listen?" Chris inquired.

Darren hesitated before shaking his head. "Not yet. I want it to be complete before you hear it."

"What if I'm gone before you're finished," Chris asked, and he immediately regretted it. Darren's face fell and he felt some kind of mutual disappointment between the two of them. Chris didn't want to think about leaving San Francisco; not when he was with Darren. He'd only known the man for about nineteen hours, but Chris was already dreading the day he'd have to say goodbye.

"You won't be. I'll make sure of it." Darren placed his guitar in its case and closed the lid. "So, why couldn't you sleep?"

Chris shifted nervously in place and fumbled around in his head for anything that might sound convincing. Anything but the truth. "I don't know. It must have been the coffee I drank a few hours ago."

Darren stood back up and placed his guitar case behind the counter. "That would do it. Are you hungry?"

"Is that your go-to icebreaker?" Chris chuckled.

"No, but I thought if I can't sleep and you can't sleep, we may as well make something of tonight, right? I know this great place just around the corner if you'd like to accompany me."

Chris searched his pockets. "I didn't bring any money or any-"

"You don't need money. I promise." Darren reached for Chris' hand, and the impact it had on his nerves hadn't decreased any from this morning.

Chris allowed Darren to lead him out of the shop, pausing as he locked the door behind him, but not letting go of his hand. Chris was staring to get the feeling that Darren was a very hands-on guy and liked to feel a physical connection with those around him. He _was_ straight, after-all, so the contact couldn't have meant anything more.

"I hope you like cookies and hot cocoa because that's about all this place has."

Chris felt Darren squeezed his hand but imagined it was just a reflex from Darren's bubbly personality.

They reached a little store, much like the music shop, but the atmosphere didn't seem quite as calming. Darren opened the door for Chris and followed him inside.

Chris realized they were in some kind of costume shop, but it was much different from anything he'd ever seen. There were racks and racks of strange costumes, masks hanging all around the place, and even more costumes hanging from the ceiling. He could barely see three feet in front of him before he was forced to look around the corner.

Darren pulled him along, weaving his way through the racks and gruesome accessories until they reached a door at the back of the shop. He knocked on the door, still not letting Chris' hand go.

"Eugene?" he called out. "Eugene, it's Darren. Open up."

A few seconds later, the door opened up and an older man with dark hair and blue streaks appeared in the doorway. He instantly pulled Darren into a hug which Darren gladly returned.

"Eugene, this is my friend, Chris," he said once they pulled apart.

Chris stepped forward, making a mental note to think about being called a _friend_ later.

"Hello there, kid." Eugene stuck out his hand.

Chris felt like the entire situation was a little bizarre, and maybe Darren really was setting him up after all. Darren might not have been as harmless as Chris had originally believed, and he soon found himself wondering if he shouldn't have stayed in his hotel room and dealt with his fear-induced insomnia by himself.

"Hi," Chris cautiously shook his hand.

"I've known Eugene since I was about seven. He was the one who put together all of my Halloween costumes when I was growing up, and he's fucking amazing if I may say so myself."

"R-really?" Chris tried to steady his voice but his nerves were getting the better of him.

"Come on back." Eugene stepped aside and made his way back into what Chris realized was some kind of private room, much like a den of some sort. "Would you like anything to drink?"

"I promised Chris some cocoa if you wouldn't mind."

"Coming right up." Eugene disappeared through another door and Darren turned to Chris.

"Relax, okay? He's harmless. This guy is like another grandpa to me."

Chris didn't have to force a smile onto his face. Darren just did that to him.

Chris stepped deeper into the room and took a seat next to Darren on the black, leather couch against the wall. It may not have been what he had been expecting when he left his room earlier that night, but with Darren by his side, their hands still intertwined, he had a feeling the night would exceed his expectations.

XXX

"This guy does a fantastic job with these costumes." Chris sat cross-legged on Darren's bed looking through an old photo album while Darren dug around in his closet for a movie to watch.

By the time they left Eugene's, the time was approaching 4:00, but neither one of them were tired. Chris was pumped full of rich hot cocoa and triple chocolate cookies, and his mind wouldn't even slow down for a few seconds. He was practically bouncing up and down as he looked at the pictures of Darren's various Halloween costumes through the years.

"Told you," Darren smirked and crawled out of his closet with a movie in hand as he shoved everything back inside and squeezed the door shut. "He's worked on set for a couple different movies, and I think he might be going to LA in a few months for another one. His costumes are one-of-a-kind."

"And he lives in the shop?" Chris questioned.

Darren nodded. "There's a little office area above the store that he's turned into his apartment. It's not much, but after his wife died, it's all he needed." Darren popped the DVD into his DVD Player and made his way over to the bed. He took his spot next to Chris against the headboard and pointed to one of the pictures while waiting for the menu screen to appear.

"This one was one of my favorites." The picture was slightly faded and held down by two pieces of tape on the corners, but the costume Darren was wearing in the photograph almost looked professional. "That was when I was twelve. I went through a major Batman phase, and all I wanted that year was to be the joker. I didn't want to paint my face and leave it at that, though. I told my mom I would look like a clown. So Eugene did everything he could to find the perfect pieces, and he did my make-up. I looked scarred and everything. I owed him so fucking much that year. I even won the local costume contest."

"And now you're close to him?"

Darren shrugged. "He and I have one thing in common. We both have insomnia, only his is diagnosed. Once I started going to the shop every night, I would get hungry and end up going home. One Winter night he saw me and asked me if I'd like to come inside out of the cold. So I did, and he made me hot cocoa and handed me a few cookies and that's how this entire thing started. I stop by almost every night."

Chris hummed in acknowledgment and Darren turned his attention to the TV as the menu for August Rush appeared. He kept the volume down because his parents were now home and allowed himself to relax next to Chris. Chris, however, couldn't let himself relax. He was too busy staring at Darren's profile and trying not to get caught.

Chris nearly jumped when Darren reached over and grabbed his hand, giving it a little squeeze. "Thanks for watching this movie with me, by the way."

"I'm happy to have someone to watch it with."

Darren smiled brightly, gave Chris' hand one more squeeze, and watched the opening credits of the movie.

XXX

When Chris woke up the following morning, he was in an unfamiliar room and a heavy object was draped over his stomach. It only took matter of seconds before he realized it was only Darren's arm holding him close and the other man's unruly curls which were in his face. Chris tried to ease himself out of Darren's grasp before he woke up, but Chris' struggle only made Darren hold on tighter.

Less than a minute later Darren cracked one eye open, squinting from the light coming through the window, and smiled at Chris. A few seconds later reality hit, and he jerked away.

"Shit. I'm sorry, Chris. I-I didn't mean to. I've been known to cuddle." He looked away, embarrassed.

"I-it's okay. I didn't mean to fall asleep last night. I'm sorry." Chris sat up and looked around for a clock, but soon realized there wasn't one in sight. He figured Darren wasn't the type to care about punctuality anyway. "What time is it?"

Darren rolled over and pulled his phone off of the nightstand. "11:25."

"I slept in that late?" Chris was astounded. He'd never been able to sleep past 9:30 before. Staying up all night must have had its side effects.

Darren nodded. "You hungry? I can get my mom to make us some lunch."

Chris' eyes filled with panic. "Shit. I forgot about them. I-I'll just go. I'll sneak out. They won't even know this happened, I promise."

Chris started to slide off of the bed, but Darren grabbed his wrist and pulled him back. "Chris, it's okay. She won't care." Chris relaxed and Darren let him go. "Would it make you feel better if I let her know you're here before you come down and meet her?"

"Please," Chris pleaded.

"Okay. I'll be right back." Darren shuffled out of his room and down the stairs, following the scent of bacon coming from the kitchen.

He greeted his mom with a kiss on the cheek and stood on the other side of the counter. Chuck was sitting in a chair at the dining room table eating a sandwich and mumbled something under his breath when Darren walked in.

"What are you even doing here?" Darren asked, and even though he meant it as a rhetorical question, he was greeted with a response.

"New York got boring, so I came home for a few days." Chuck shoved the sandwich in his mouth and took another bite. Darren turned away before he could be any more disgusted.

"Hey, Mom," Darren began. He wasn't sure how to continue. He knew Cerina wouldn't mind that Chris had stayed over, but he still felt awkward bringing it up. "Um, I have someone in y room."

Cerina looked up from the tomato she was slicing. "Did they stay the night?"

"Yeah." Darren didn't realize he was gripping the counter so hard his knuckles were turning white until he felt them begin to go numb. He let go of the counter and shook out his hands, realizing he was more nervous than he had thought. "We were out really late and by the time we made it back home we were too exhausted to move. We fell asleep during our movie."

Chuck stood up from the table and took a can of coke from the fridge. "Yeah? What's her name? Is she hot?"

"His name's Chris." Darren looked from Chuck to his mom, finally noticing the small smile playing on her lips.

"Well, bring him down. There's no need to hide out up there. I hope he's hungry for BLTs."

"Thanks, Mom." Darren leaned in with a gigantic grin and kissed her cheek again. "I'll be right back."

Cerina watched him go, unsure if she'd ever seen her son look the way he did whenever he was talking about Chris.

XXX

Chris was still sitting at the head of Darren's bed when he saw the older boy stumble back through the doorway.

"My mom is making lunch and wants to know if you'd like to go eat." Darren perched himself on the foot of the bed. When Chris didn't say anything, Darren moved a little closer and took his hand, but Chris yanked it back. "What's wrong?"

"I don't do this. I don't meet new people. They never like me or give me a chance. They take one look at me and categorize me under this little gay column and decide I have some kind of contagious disease." Chris wrapped his arms around himself, stared out of Darren's bedroom window, and continued counting the number of red cars that drove by. It gave his mind something to do.

Darren attempted to hold Chris' hand again because it was the only thing he could think to do to comfort the younger boy. "I like you, Chris, and I think I'm taking the time to get to know you before forming any kind of opinion. So you're gay. That doesn't even cross my mind when I'm with you.

"People are different here, Chris. There are judgmental bastards everywhere, but San Francisco isn't like that, and my family sure as hell isn't. If you will trust me and look at me, I'll promise you one thing."

Chris took a few seconds to let what Darren was saying sink in and slowly turned his head to face him. "What is that?" he whispered.

Darren looked into his eyes and Chris saw more sincerity in them than he'd ever imagined he could see in someone. "I promise I won't let anyone hurt you while you're here." When Chris opened his mouth to protest, Darren held up a hand and continued. "I know you haven't said much about wherever you're from, but I have a feeling you came here for more than a vacation. I want you to find whatever you came here for, and I'll be here to help. In the meantime, my mom would really like to meet the guy who stayed the night with her son because she has this pathological need to feed everyone who steps foot inside of her house, and I guarantee she'll love you. So will you please come downstairs with me?"

Chris took a deep breath before nodding his head. Darren smiled and pulled him off of the bed before leading him down the stairs and into the kitchen. Darren still hadn't let go of his hand, and although the small action confused Chris, Darren's firm grasp felt too amazing to let go. Chris knew this gesture was just one of the things that made Darren who he was, and further convinced Chris that his theory about Darren needing to be physically connected with everyone, was true.

"Mom, this is Chris. Chris, this is my mom, Cerina." Darren nudged Chris further into the kitchen.

"Hi, ma'am. It's nice to meet you." Chris held out his hand, but Cerina's loving arms were soon wrapped around him instead.

"It's nice to meet you, Chris. Help yourself to anything you see here." She moved out of the way and Chris followed Darren to the kitchen island. He was weary to get too far away from Darren. Darren seemed to keep him at ease and he was strangely more comfortable around the man he'd just met the previous morning than he had been around his former classmates whom he had known for years.

"Do you have any plans for today? One of my friends wanted to go on a group date and we're one guy short. Can I tell the lucky remaining lady that you're her date?"

Darren turned to where Chuck was still sitting at the kitchen table; the only difference was the new sandwich sitting in front of him. "No thanks. I think I'll pass today."

"Okay, but tomorrow's the Fourth of July and I'm sure they would love to at least have you at the barbeque. We always have fun doing crazy shit over there."

Chris sat down next to Darren at the table and stayed silent as Darren spoke with his brother.

"I actually have plans for tomorrow," Darren turned him down again.

Cerina stepped up to the table with a plate of fresh chocolate chip cookies. "Chris, sweetie, what are you doing to celebrate tomorrow?"

"Oh, I actually don-"

"He's coming with me, Mom," Darren cut him off.

Chris quickly turned his head to the other side. "What?" he asked, a little breathless.

"Only if you want to, of course."

"I do," Chris smiled. He was curious to see what Darren had planned for the following night.

Chuck eyed Darren suspiciously and looked over to Chris and back. "Darren, you could have just told me you were planning on asking Chris out on a da-"

Darren cut Chuck off with a playful slap to the back of his head. The two immediately started wrestling around, only stopping when Cerina made them separate.

Chris sat back and watched Darren interact with his family. As much as he loved his own family, he couldn't shake the feeling that something was still missing from his life. Little did he know that it was in that very room.

XXX

Once he was finished eating, Chris tried to help Cerina with the dishes, but she refused. After shooing him out of the kitchen with Darren following close behind, they made their way back up to Darren's room.

"See. Was that so bad?" Darren joked.

Chris made his way to Darren's bed and sat down on the end as Darren closed the door behind them. "Your mom is really nice."

Darren moved to sit beside Chris and turned his body to face him. "She loved you, you know. I mean, she loves everyone, but I can tell who in particular becomes an instant favorite. You, Chris, are her new favorite."

Chris brushed it off and shook his head. "You're crazy. She doesn't even know me."

"Why does that matter to you so much? Why can't you accept that people may like you exactly the way you are?"

"You don't know what high school was like for me," Chris muttered and looked away.

"Well," Darren shifted a little closer, "tell me. What shit did you go through to make you so unconvinced that I _like_ you just the way you are? Just like this. Everything you seem to dislike about yourself. Gay, shy, and utterly adorable. When you let your personality come out, that's when _you_ come out. Don't be afraid to show others that side."

"The vulnerable side? There's a good reason the wall between those two sides isn't able to be budged."

"And why is that?"

Chris wanted to tell Darren the truth. He even thought talking about it might make it seem like he could finally be free of it all, but something inside of him was telling him to wait. Despite how comfortable he felt around Darren, they had just met, and Chris couldn't do that to him. It wasn't right to unload that much onto someone who was helping him out. "I can't talk about it," he said instead. "Not yet. I'm not ready."

"Okay," Darren comforted. "I'm not going to push you, but I'm here if you need me." He stood up in front of Chris. "I'm going to take a shower. Would you like to use the bathroom across the hall?"

"Oh, no. I thought I would just take a shower back at the hotel later. I don't want to intrude anym-"

"Chris, you aren't intruding!" Darren interrupted with a playful grin.

"I'd still feel better knowing someone was getting paid to clean up after me. I need to go pay for another night anyway."

"Oh, so you're staying there again?"

"I need a place to sleep, Darren. I know you may not, but some of us do."

"I know, I just thought you might have changed your mind and wanted to stay here after all."

Chris hesitated. "Darren, I-"

"Look, you don't have to, but I can even make you up a spot on the couch so you don't have to accidentally fall asleep," he used air quotes around the latter three words, "in my bed again."

Chris slapped him in the arm and Darren feigned pain. Neither one of them could contain the grins that lit up their faces. "You know I would never have slept up here intentionally."

"No? Am I really that bad?"

Chris shook his head. "No, you aren't." A silence hung in the air for a few seconds before Chris continued. His whisper was quiet, but it sounded like a rocket taking off in the already silent room. "You're a confusing mystery to me."

Darren didn't say anything at first. He stood still next to his bed, keeping his distance and letting Chris say what he needed to say.

"I… you do things that no one else has ever imagined doing to me and with me. Back home, I don't have friends, and I certainly don't have a friend who is so comfortable with physical contact that they hold their friend's hands."

"We're friends?" Darren asked with a bit of hopefulness in his voice and his eyebrows raised.

Color rose to Chris' cheeks. "I didn't mean that. It was just a way to-"

"Chris," Darren said firmly to calm the other boy down before he could get too worked up. "We're friends." He took a breath in an attempt to steady his quickly-beating heart and took Chris' hand in his. "And about holding your hand. That's no-"

Darren's voice was interrupted by a light knock on the door. "Darren, would you mind running out to get me some pepperoni? I'm making a couple pizzas tonight." Cerina cracked the door open. She didn't miss her son's hand wrapped around Chris', but made a point not to make it obvious.

"Sure, Mom. We'll go in a few minutes."

"Thank you. Chris, you're welcome to stay for dinner. We'll have plenty and you can meet Darren's dad."

Chris looked to Darren and saw him nod before answering. "That sounds nice. Thank you," he smiled back.

"Well, don't stay out too long. I want to get this in the oven." Cerina turned around and left, gently easing the door shut behind her.

"Come on," Darren tugged on Chris' hand. I know just the place to take you."

XXX

Chris was pulled into a little deli shop not too far away from Darren's house. It was a cramped little space which didn't seem to have much of an organization system, and the items in stock were constantly rotating in and out. He noticed shelves of fresh bread and homemade jam and made a mental note to come back and buy a jar for his mom before he left San Francisco.

Darren knew his way around the disorganized mess pretty well, which didn't surprise Chris much. Darren had probably been going to the deli for years. Chris was quickly beginning to realize that most of Darren's favorite things about the city were unorganized and unstructured. That thought would have scared him a few days ago, but now… now he was starting to take to the chaos surrounding him. It was something new, something carefree, and something he would always associate with the curly-haired man standing beside him.

Darren turned to him after grabbing a couple oranges from a bowl near the counter. "Is there anything you'd like?" he asked.

Chris shook his head. "It's fine. I can come back later."

"Chris, what do you want?"

"Nothing. I've got plenty of time before I leave."

Darren began walking around the store, grabbing random items and tossing them in a wicker basket he'd picked up near the door.

"Darren, what are you doing?" Chris grabbed his wrist when he tried to pick up a bag of homemade trail mix.

"We aren't leaving the store until I know we have what you want," Darren said firmly and dropped the bag into the basket.

Chris crossed his arms and looked at Darren for a few seconds, clearly judging him, before sighing. Darren was nothing if not stubborn, Chris was quickly learning, and he didn't want to be stuck with food he wouldn't eat. "I was going to get a jar of jam to take home to my mom."

Darren looked pleased. "Thank you." He placed the items he'd taken back on the shelves in their respective locations and led Chris to the jams. "Which kind did you want?"

Chris studied the labels before pointing to a sugar-free black raspberry. Darren picked it up and handed it to Chris before walking to the counter.

"Harold?" Darren called out, leaning over the counter to peek into the storage room.

A few seconds later a middle-aged man walked out wearing a green apron and wiping his hands on a dish towel. "Darren. What can I get for you today?"

Chris wasn't surprised that Darren had made a friend there as well. Darren was friendlier that anyone he had ever met. Chris would be shocked if someone actually _disliked_ Darren.

"Mom wants some pepperoni."

"A pound like usual?" Harold pulled a bag out from underneath the counter and began filling it with sliced pepperoni.

"Yes, please." Darren pulled his wallet out and began laying some cash on the counter. Chris set the jam on the counter and began to do the same, but Darren shoved it away. "Put that away."

"But the jam-"

"Is on me," Darren finished for him. He turned his attention back to Harold and grabbed the bag of pepperoni. "I'd also like two root beer floats, please. Make one of them the glass mug." Darren set the jam, pepperoni, and oranges inside a paper bag.

"Two root beer floats." Harold set the cups on the counter and Darren exchanged them for the cash in his hand. He handed the mug to Chris—Chris noticed the deli's logo, the golden gate bridge, and the words "San Francisco" written on the side—and took his change from Harold.

"Well, take a sip," Darren encouraged. They made their way out of the shop and the little bell above the door rang when it was opened. Chris smiled at how cliché the little shop seemed, but at the same time, it held a certain uniqueness that he adored.

He lifted the mug to his lips and took a drink of the root beer. "Oh my god, this is amazing."

Darren chuckled and finally took a drink of his own. "He makes everything on his own, Harold. Some of his things can be a bit pricy, but you won't find anything close to the quality of what you will find in that store."

"You really didn't have to get this. Either of these." Chris nodded towards the bag Darren was holding.

"Hey, we're running errands for my mom. It's the least I could do." They continued walking down the street, sipping their drinks, and blending in with those around them.

"I like going with you, though. This is nothing like what I expected my trip to San Francisco to be."

"Is it still good?" Darren questioned.

Chris smiled and subconsciously leaned into Darren, their shoulders brushing lightly and their hands linking together. "It's better."

XXX

"Darren, we've been gone for over an hour. Your mom is going to kill us."

"Relax. She'll have plenty of time to make the pizza. I want to take you somewhere first, and we're almost there." After a few more steps, Darren halted and Chris nearly ran into him.

They turned away from the street and that's when Chris saw the San Francisco sunlight dancing around on the mosaic stairs in front of him. He'd seen pictures before, but nothing had done them justice. Seeing the vibrant colors in person was astounding.

"This," Darren set the paper bag down, took a step forward, and hopped onto the first step," is one of my favorite places in the city." He jogged up the steps, stopping about a third of the way up. Chris was still standing on the sidewalk at the bottom of the stairs looking up at Darren. "What do you see here, Chris?"

Chris didn't know where he was going with this, but gave in to Darren's games and answered the best he could. "Mosaic stairs?" His answer came out as a question.

"More than that. Are they monochromatic, do you see three or four colors, or a fucking rainbow?" Darren sat down on one of the stairs and brushed a few leaves aside.

Chris chuckled up at Darren and answered, "A fucking rainbow."

"That's it!" Darren exclaimed. "Okay, now tell me. Is each step the same? Do you see the same thing each step of the way?"

Chris sighed and relaxed against the railing. "No."

"Good. You're doing well." Darren stood back up and walked down a few steps. "Now are the mosaic tiles each a perfect little geometric shape or do they take on a more organic form?"

Chris inspected the first few steps a little closer even though he already knew the answer. "I'd say they're very much organic." He stepped back and stared up at Darren. "What are you getting at here?"

Darren stepped back down in front of Chris and took his hands. "Each of these steps… they're different. No two steps are alike. No two tiles are alike. They each take on a different form, a different color, a different purpose. They're a tiny portion of the bigger picture, and without one of them, the scene would be incomplete.

"Chris, you may have had a hard life back at home with people who treated you like you were nothing, but no two cities are the same. While that city may have been a dark, midnight blue to you, San Francisco can be a bright yellow. Those people may have been a dark cloud pinning you down, but that doesn't mean other people are going to be the same way. Everyone is different. The people you see here in San Francisco, the ones I'm showing you, even _me_… hell, _especially_ me… we aren't going to be that for you. You can't convince yourself that everyone was created in a perfect little mold, all a single shade with a single purpose. Each step of your life is going to be different from the past, just like each of these steps are unique in their own way. However, they come together to form a beautiful picture."

Chris stayed silent and Darren turned his head towards the stairs. "I want you to look over there. I want you to think about each of these pieces. Think about where they came from, what they went through. What were they before they were mosaic tiles? No matter how much they went through, good or bad, they ended up here. They ended up being a part of something beautiful, something that brings joy and wonder to hundreds of people."

When Darren squeezed his hands, Chris looked away from the stairs and into Darren's eyes. "I don't want you to feel like you're powerless or that your life isn't going anywhere, Chris. I don't want you to keep to yourself and not let others see what I see, because you're going to go off and do fucking amazing things in this world. You're going to end up bringing so much happiness into someone's life by being yourself. I can't tell you what to do, but I know what I see in you, and I love every part of it. I know you're going to go home and feel like you can't get away. You may feel trapped inside the confines of whatever city it is you live in, but you won't be there forever. One day," Darren turned back to the stairs and let go of Chris' left hand, "you're going to shine as bright as these stairs and you're going to be even more beautiful than you already are."

Chris stood beside Darren and stared at the mosaic tiles in front of him, but he couldn't focus on their color or the individual pieces or the larger picture they created. Instead, he thought about Darren's words. No one had ever said anything as meaningful to him, not even his parents. For the first time, he felt like someone _really_ saw deep inside of him, and the confidence Darren had in him made his heart swell and his stomach clench.

Before giving it a second though, he wrapped his arms tightly around Darren's waist and buried his face into Darren's curls. "Thank you, Dare," he whispered. He eyes were filled with unshed tears, but he wasn't scared to let them fall. And that's exactly what he did.

Darren held him close, not caring about the groceries he had, his mom waiting back home, the sun beating down on them, or the people occasionally walking by. All he cared about in that moment was the boy in his arms.

* * *

**Review and let me know what you think? I love hearing your opinions :)**


	3. Chapter 3

After dinner Darren insisted on walking Chris back to his hotel. Once there, Chris paid for another night and led Darren up to his room so they could spend a little bit more time together before Darren had to go home.

Chris set his keys on the nightstand and placed the jam Darren had bought for him in his suitcase between a few shirts to make sure the jar wouldn't break.

Darren made himself comfortable in the middle of the bed, sitting cross-legged and looking at the daily newspaper that was left in front of the door.

Chris grabbed a change of clothes and stepped inside the bathroom for a quick shower (he hadn't taken one since the morning before and was starting to feel a bit disgusting due to the heat). He hadn't realized he'd started singing along to the melodies in his head—it just came naturally—but Darren did. He set the newspaper down in his lap and listened to the voice making its way through the cracks in the door.

After about ten minutes the water shut off, and a few minutes later Chris stepped out in a pair of loose jeans and a thin, solid grey v-neck. His thick chestnut hair was still damp and sticking out every which way and there were a few beads of water still attached to his neck.

Darren tried to direct his focus somewhere else, but before he had time, Chris sat down in front of him, seemingly unaware that Darren had just been staring.

"Sorry about that. I feel much better now." He picked at the edge of the newspaper before Darren folded it and tossed it aside.

"What would you like to do now?" Darren folded his hands in his lap.

"This is your city. You're supposed to be showing me a good time," Chris joked.

"You came here with the intention of seeing everything on your own. You just got lucky and found me," Darren grinned in reply.

"Touché," Chris paused and briefly looked away. He took note of the bright green letters on the alarm clock. 9:13. "Let's go do something, Criss. The night's still young."

"How do you feel about a walk on the pier? There's a really great place to get calamari."

"You just ate a few hours ago!" Chris laughed, but hopped off of the bed and slipped on a pair of shoes.

Darren rolled off shortly after and picked Chris' keys up, moving them out of Chris' reach when he made a grab for them. "Ahhh, I'm driving. You can relax tonight, okay?"

"You don't know how to drive my car," Chris protested.

"Does it have a steering wheel and pedals?"

Chris shook his head, not in disagreement, but because of how silly Darren could be. "Fine, but this means I get to pay tonight."

"We'll see about that," Darren smirked and trotted out the door, leaving Chris to follow.

XXX

Darren and Chris walked along the pier and shared an order of calamari—Darren won their brief argument and paid, only when Chris realized that he'd left his wallet back at the hotel once again.

Their hands seemed to find each other and by now, Chris wasn't surprised by the gesture. It felt natural, as if their hands were specially created to gravitate towards one another, like opposite poles of a magnet.

"Seagulls," Darren randomly stated. He handed the little cardboard try to Chris so he could use his free hand to grab a bite. Once it was in his mouth, he took it back and allowed Chris to do the same.

Chris turned his head to the side as he began chewing. "What?"

Darren pointed to the railing a ways down the pier. "You know, like Finding Nemo. Nigel."

Chris wasn't following, but Darren had a way of spinning his thoughts off of their axis, always complicating their conversations.

Darren continued, "He flew all over the place… knew everything. He helped Nemo out."

"He did," Chris agreed.

"That's how I think of myself when I'm around you."

"I make you feel like a seagull?"

"Not just _any_ seagull. _Nigel_."

"I don't need to be saved, Darren."

"No? Then why did you come to San Francisco?"

Chris pondered Darren's questions for a few minutes as they continued to walk. Darren carelessly threw their empty container into a trashcan as they passed and gave Chris some time to think. The longer they walked, the farther away they got from the mass of bodies, and the darker it got.

"I don't need to be saved by someone else," he finally said. "I'm strong enough to get through things on my own. I have been for years."

"I know that, Chris. I told you that earlier today. But that doesn't mean you can't accept help."

They paused at the railing and Chris gazed out at the ocean. The sky was cloudy once again and the ocean's calm ripples were beginning to become coarse waves.

"Growing up, I never had anyone I could call a friend. I had classmates and people I met at our local theater in Clovis—that's where I'm from, by the way—but they were never there for me. Not like you have been." Chris looked up at Darren, knowing he was putting everything on the line in that moment.

"I want to be there for you, Chris, because no one should have to go through anything alone."

Chris turned his focus back to the water. "I'm still trying to figure out why you're so interested in helping an eighteen-year-old-boy you just met yesterday."

"Hey," Darren nudged him, "I thought we were friends."

Chris smiled, but Darren could tell his heart wasn't in it. "This is who I am, Chris. I'm friends with everyone. I think life's too short to waste time ignoring someone or sitting still all day. I want to be doing things. I want to look back in twenty years with no regrets, only hundreds of memories. There's already enough bad shit in this world to worry about."

Chris felt a few raindrops hitting his bare arm. "So you feel obligated to talk to me."

"That's not what I meant. You… you're different."

"Don't be silly. I'm no different than anyone else you're trying to help out. You feel a need to do so, so you do."

"Dammit, Chris. Stop, okay? Just stop. This," Darren reclaimed Chris' hand, "is not an obligation. I don't walk up to random strangers I meet and grab their hand or spend entire days with them or invite them to stay the night at my house." Darren's voice started to rise, but for the first time, he felt like Chris was really listening. "Stop acting like I don't care about you because I do. I do. Way more than I probably should."

Chris slowly nodded and when he spoke, his voice was even less than a whisper. "Okay."

Just then the rain started picking up, beginning to seep into their clothes. "Shit, come on." Darren tugged on Chris' hand and ran towards the car. Luckily they weren't parked too far away.

Darren yanked the back, driver's side door open because it was the closest one and slid inside after Chris. He let out a deep breath and relaxed against the seat, allowing his head to fall back and his eyes to close. He'd only had them shut for a few seconds before Chris spoke.

"I've been physically and emotionally beat up every single day for the past four years simply for being who I am, so I'm weary of anyone I come in contact with." Chris' hands were folded in his lap and his head was turned down when he spoke. His voice was quiet, and Darren wanted to move closer so he could hear better, but he didn't. He didn't say anything; just waited for Chris to continue.

"I'm sorry for doubting you or acting like I don't trust you. Truthfully, I do, and that scares the shit out of me."

The rain was pouring down on the roof of Chris' car, but Darren was so attuned to Chris that the noise of heavy raindrops repeatedly pounding down all around them didn't have any effect on the fragile voice begging to be heard over the chaos. Approximately every thirty seconds the sky would be lit up for a fraction of a moment, followed by the loud bang of thunder. In that brief instant, Darren could see Chris' face in a brighter light, see the pain behind his eyes that he couldn't otherwise see when the only light they had was the dim yellow streetlight not too far from their car.

"Trusting you means opening a part of myself up that I've worked so hard to keep stitched closed. I'm afraid of uncovering a part of me because my wounds are still so fresh. One small bump along the way would send a pain rushing through my body, and Darren, you could do a hell of a lot of damage."

Darren slowly reached over for Chris' hand and intertwined their fingers. "Chris. I promise I'm never going to hurt you. Sometimes another hand can help to heal things a little quicker."

Chris shifted closer to Darren and rested his head on his shoulder without giving it much thought. Darren wrapped his arm snug around Chris and it made Chris feel safe and warm and protected. Maybe he could allow Darren to protect his heart as well; he just had to find the courage to give it to him.

"The night I came here—or morning, whatever you want to call it—I was lying in my bed staring at the ceiling. I'd never felt so alone before. I thought graduating meant I would finally get out of Clovis, and I would make something of myself. But I didn't.

"All throughout high school, my parents drove me to audition after audition, and no one even gave me a second thought. My dreams are being crushed, I'm going nowhere with my life, and everyone in my town would rather me be dead than be gay."

Chris buried his face deeper into Darren's shirt and he could feel the tears prickling in the corners of his eyes. "I almost killed myself, Darren. I was so close to doing it because what is the point in living when no one wants me here?"

"Chris," Darren choked out. He pulled him as close as physically possible and let his own tears fall at Chris' confession.

Chris was nearly sobbing by this point, realizing just how close he'd come to missing out on the rest of his life and the man holding him in his arms. "I don't know what to do anymore."

"Shhh, Chris. I've got you, baby. You're not going anywhere." Darren kissed the top of his head and shifted so they were lying down in the seat.

Chris kept his face buried deep inside of Darren and let Darren hold his trembling body. He couldn't even feel Darren also trembling beneath him.

It was only a matter of minutes until they had cried themselves to sleep, never letting go of each other.

XXX

Chris woke up the next day to the feeling of Darren's soft breaths against his forehead. He raised his head up to look out of the window of the car. The sun wasn't too far up in the sky yet, and the cars from the night before were replaced by a new set of tourists'.

Chris felt Darren pull him back down and wrap his arms tighter around him. "Mmm'orning." Darren's eyes were still closed, but his lips turned upwards into a smile.

Chris smiled back at the sight and allowed himself to relax against Darren. After the previous night, he didn't feel that there were too many barriers left between them, and exhilaration washed through him at the thought.

"I can't believe we slept here all night. I can't believe I _slept_."

Darren finally opened his eyes and his hazel met Chris' own blue, just a few inches apart. "You were exhausted."

"You called me 'baby'," Chris recalled out-of-the-blue.

"What?" Darren sat up a little bit and Chris moved away from him slightly, but not enough to create much distance between them.

"Last night. The last thing I remember is you saying that."

"Oh." Darren looked out the window at the pier. Everything was still wet from the night before, but the ocean was much calmer. "I didn't mean anything by that. It was just instinct I guess." He looked over at Chris, and the hurt he saw behind his blue eyes forced him to continue. Disappointing Chris was the last thing he wanted to do. "I don't know why I do the things I do when you're around, Chris. I meant it when I said you're different. I-I... I can't control my thoughts or my words or my actions when I'm with you, and I don't know why. It's fucking confusing because that's not who I am. I always know exactly what to say." Darren scooted a bit closer to Chris. "I like myself the best when I'm with you, though."

Chris didn't say anything. He wasn't sure what _to_ say.

Darren rested his head on Chris' shoulder and looked up at him. "I'll drive you back to your hotel and then walk home from there, okay?"

"Oh. O-okay."

Darren moved to the driver's seat as Chris moved to the passenger's seat. They stayed quiet as Darren shifted the car into gear and pulled out of the parking lot.

"Chris?"

It was Chris' turn to answer. "Yeah?"

"You… you still want to hang out with me today, right?"

"Of course!" Chris wondered where Darren would get a crazy idea that he didn't want to spend Fourth of July with him.

"Good." Darren smiled and reached over to take Chris' hand.

"Hey, Darren?"

"Yeah?" Darren looked quickly to Chris before turning his attention back to the road.

Chris looked over at him. "There's no need to go back to my hotel, you know. I don't need anything." Their time was already limited, and he wanted to spend as much of it with Darren as possible.

"I was hoping you would pack up your things and check out while I was gone so you could stay with me tonight."

Chris sighed dramatically. "Only because you're so persistent." He grinned and squeezed Darren's hand. "Give me five minutes to throw everything in my suitcase and I'll drive you to your house myself."

"Okay." Darren leaned over and kissed his cheek as if it was something he'd done a hundred times before.

Chris didn't know what any of this meant, but for once, he wasn't scared to find out.

XXX

Darren and Chris spent the rest of the morning in the small, but cozy, living room of Darren's house—they had packed Chris' few things and checked him out of the hotel by 10:30 that morning. His mom was delighted to have Chris staying with them for the remainder of his trip, much to Chris' surprise.

Cerina was scurrying around the house, cleaning the table and dusting the shelves in between baking pies and grilling hamburgers. Darren briefly mentioned something about a party she was throwing before he ran up to his room, returning with a movie in his hands.

"Really, Dare? _The Patriot_?"

"I'm nothing if not patriotic." He slipped the movie in the DVD player and took his place on the couch next to Chris.

Chris snuggled up to his side and marveled at how wonderful it felt to rest his head against Darren's chest.

"Comfortable?" Darren tilted his head a bit.

"Yes, thank you." Chris turned his focus towards the movie for the remainder of their stay at his house.

Once finished with the movie, they hopped into Chris' car—Darren still insisted on driving, claiming the night was a surprise for Chris—and headed towards an unknown destination.

The ride was fairly silent until Chris started yelling in excitement. "Wait, wait, wait! Stop!"

Darren had come close to slamming on the breaks, but eased the car to the curb between two others. "What?"

Without saying a word, Chris pulled out his phone and snapped a picture of the Yoda statue to their right. "I can't believe I almost forgot that this was here!"

Darren looked at Chris, incredulously.

"What?" Chris tilted his head.

"N-nothing." Darren looked away, bashful.

"Star Wars is an excellent film."

"I know it is," Darren agreed, defensively. He looked over at Chris and watched him snap a few pictures. Darren couldn't take his eyes off of him, not even when Chris turned back around in his seat.

"Are you sure everything is okay?" Chris asked when Darren still hadn't looked away.

Darren squeezed Chris' hand and pulled away from the curb. "It's perfect."

XXX

After crossing the Golden Gate Bridge, Darren pulled off into a little parking lot and shut the car off. While he retrieved something from the trunk, Chris took a moment to look at the city from afar. The view of the water, the bridge, and the skyline against the orange, sunset-lit sky was beautiful.

Chris eventually stepped out of the car and met Darren at the front, taking his extended hand. "You brought a cooler?" Chris questioned once he realized what Darren was carrying.

"We didn't eat dinner, so I stole a few hamburgers and some potato salad from my mom."

Darren led them up the hill to a relatively flat area. He took the blanket that had been sitting on top of the cooler and spread it out across the ground before sitting down and pulling Chris with him.

"Do you want to eat now?" Darren asked.

Chris' stomach growled in reply and they both laughed. "I guess that's a yes."

Darren pulled out a bag of hamburger buns, the hamburger patties, and a container of potato salad. "I actually have a bag of chips and a couple bottles of water in the backseat. I'll go get them."

As Darren ran back to the car, Chris removed the lid of the potato salad and sat the two forks on top. Then, he began making his hamburger.

"One bottle of water for you," Darren said as he handed it over and sat back down.

"Thank you."

"My mom's potato salad is fucking amazing, by the way. Sorry I didn't bring plates or anything."

"What's a true picnic without getting a little messy?"

Darren held his water bottle up and met Chris'. "To freedom."

"To freedom," Chris repeated, but for some reason, he didn't feel all that free yet.

XXX

About halfway through their dessert—red and blue Jell-O with whipped cream—a few of the bigger fireworks started going off in front of them.

"This is the best place to watch the fireworks. You can see the show the city puts on, as well as all of the others."

"It's pretty. Back in Clovis there isn't a very good place to watch the fireworks."

Darren looked over at Chris then, and giggled when he noticed the little bit of whipped cream on Chris' nose. He reached over and wiped it away with his thumb. He saw Chris' cheeks begin to redden before he turned away. Darren, however, didn't turn away. He often found himself staring at Chris when he wasn't looking.

Chris laid down on his back and looked up at the sky. While he was watching the fireworks, Darren was watching him. He wondered how he got so lucky to find someone like Chris, and how no one else had completely fallen head over heels for him. As scary as it was for Darren to admit, just a few days with Chris had been better than any of the time he had spent with anyone else. Chris was quickly becoming his entire world and the reason he was so anxious to get up each morning.

Chris turned his head to the side and looked up at Darren. "You're doing it again."

Darren was nearly speechless once his eyes met Chris'. They were sparkling like Darren had never seen them sparkle before. "Doing what?"

"Staring," Chris smiled. He looked back towards the city.

Darren laid down perpendicular to Chris and rested his head on Chris' chest. When he felt Chris' hands playing with the curls on the top of his head, he relaxed into him.

Darren didn't say much for the next few minutes because words didn't seem to be enough for the way he was feeling. Instead, they watched the fireworks in the distance, and Darren let his mind wander. All at once, it hit him that Chris had never trusted anyone with his heart before, and telling Chris how he felt seemed thrilling, freeing, and absolutely terrifying all at the same time.

Darren finally broke the silence when he couldn't keep it in any longer. "Do you believe in love at first sight?"

Chris' hand stilled, but he didn't remove it. "Before I came here, I didn't even believe in love."

Darren stared off into the distance because he was afraid to meet Chris' eyes. Chris had a way of making him say anything and everything. "And now?"

"Now I think anything is possible." There was a brief silence apart from the fireworks being lit all around them. "Why do you ask?"

"No reason." Darren finally turned his head and all restraint he had seemed to dissipate. He craned his neck until their lips were just inches apart and lightly pressed his own lips against Chris'. Darren had had many kisses before, some with girls, a few with guys. They were chaste and passionate and messy. He'd kissed multiple people in numerous instances. There were stolen kisses in the hallway during high school, quick make out sessions in the backseat of a car, drunken kisses at college parties, and sloppy kisses after dates in Michigan. Each one had been different, but not a single kiss in his life was able to live up to the way the gentle kiss he was sharing with Chris felt.

Chris was caught completely off guard by the kiss. He laid on the cool ground, frozen in place at first. He felt Darren's lips on his, and they tasted sweet, much like Darren himself. He momentarily forgot how to breathe and forced the oxygen to filter through his lungs, willing his mind to function enough to take small breaths.

After a few seconds of processing what was happening, the hands which remained buried in Darren's hair fisted tight around the curls and pulled Darren up closer. Chris didn't know what was happening or why it was happening; not after years of being forced to deny who he really was. After years of being told he was worthless and wrong for not being attracted to girls. He didn't know how Darren came into his life so suddenly, but there Chris was, kissing the man who had shown him it was okay to be the person he was born to be, and nothing else mattered.

Chris didn't care about what his family would think—though he knew they would be happy for him—or what the people around him both in Clovis and San Francisco would think. All he cared about was Darren—Darren's lips; Darren's firm hands attached to his side, holding himself as close to Chris as possible. Chris wanted _more_. More of what, he wasn't sure, but nothing seemed to be enough. After years of being denied something as simple as a first kiss, the feeling of finally sharing something so special with someone he cared so much for was even more intense than anything he could have expected.

Chris' shirt rode up a few inches as they shifted into a more comfortable position, and Darren's hands were warm where they met the small patch of bare skin just uncovered. The light contact sent shivers through Chris' body which caused him to groan into Darren's parted mouth.

Chris eventually pulled away, breathless and full of bliss. "What was that for?" He didn't look upset, just confused.

Darren took a few seconds to catch his breath. It was almost like he forgot how to breathe. "Because I've been wanting to since that first morning." He pressed their lips together again, careful not to make it too much for Chris just yet. He was afraid anything more would be too much for _him_ to handle. No one had made him feel quite like Chris did, and getting used to the new feeling was much harder than he'd imagined.

"I thought you were straight," Chris laughed.

Darren looked at him quizzically. "I never said that."

"You said you had an ex-girlfriend."

"I do have an ex-girlfriend, but I've never labeled myself. I am who I am, and I'll fall in love with the person I can't live without, regardless of gender." He didn't tell Chris that he thought _he_ was the one person he would never be able to live without.

"So you like guys?"

"I like everyone."

And at that, Chris laughed again, because that was beyond true. Darren _did_ like everyone.

"I like you," Darren finally whispered, his lips just inches from Chris'.

A firework went off much closer to where they were laying, and Chris startled and jumped, causing Darren's head to slide off of his chest. Darren laughed at him and cuddled up next to his side. They watched as the fireworks show began to go off, and about halfway through Darren pulled Chris close to his side. Chris rested his head on Darren's chest and felt his heartbeat beneath his ear.

"I'm not ready for you to leave, Chris," Darren whispered.

Chris let his emotions take over, and a single tear fell from his eyes, soaking through the threads of Darren's thin cotton shirt until it reached the smooth skin underneath. Darren pretended not to notice, but the small tear felt like an ocean wave during a damaging storm, knocking his emotions sideways until their weak walls were forced to collapse.

"I'm scared to go back without you," Chris finally said.

No more words were exchanged, a few more kisses were shared, and a whole lot of feelings were felt, trying to be expressed. It was like a game of tug-of-war. The feelings were on one side, tugging, fighting, struggling to pull Darren and Chris across the invisible barrier, but the thought of Chris returning to Clovis the following night was tugging just as hard from the other side of the line. No matter how strong the feelings were, the pain of leaving each other the next day kept them from saying how they really felt. Maybe if things remained unsaid, they would eventually be able to forget they were ever there in the first place. Maybe they wouldn't be able to forget, though, because Darren had saved Chris from the omnipresent cloud that had been looming over his head for years. Darren pulled Chris away and under his sunlight, into his bright life full of love, comfort, and kindness. Chris never wanted to leave the happiness he'd found in San Francisco, but he didn't have a choice.

XXX

After awhile, the fireworks died down and the air around them became a bit chilly. Darren held Chris closer and their combined body heat kept them warm.

"Do you want to go back?"

"Can we stay out here a little bit longer? Everything is so perfect, and I'm not ready for it to end." Chris buried his face into Darren's shirt and did his best to memorize the smell of him—a mix between detergent and something Chris couldn't quite place. It was just _Darren_.

Darren kissed the top of his head and closed his eyes. "Of course, sweetie."

"I'm going to miss you." Chris was so quite when he spoke that Darren almost missed it. He almost thought it was his imagination and subconscious working together to express his fear and concerns about Chris leaving him in less than twenty-four hours.

"Oh, god, I'm going to miss you so fucking much, Chris." Darren buried his face in Chris' thick hair, and the two of them laid there, under the dim stars and falling sparks, holding each other.

"What are we going to do about this… about… us?"

Darren didn't have an answer for him. In an idealistic world, Chris could move to San Francisco, somewhere he was safe and content. He could get out of Clovis and leave his past behind. However, things weren't that easy. Leaving his _family_ wasn't that easy. "I don't know, Chris. I really don't."

Chris sighed into Darren. "I have to get out of there, Dare. I don't know what I'll do to mys-"

"No!" Darren cut him off. "No, Chris. Promise me. Promise me that if you ever feel like doing something to harm yourself, you'll call me. I'll be there as soon as possible. Just promise me you won't do anything. Promise me you won't make it impossible for me to see you again." Darren choked out the last bit and Chris reached up to brush away his tears. "Just promise me, Chris."

"I promise," Chris nodded with absolute sincerity.

"Have you thought about college? I know you mentioned going to auditions, and you can still do that, but maybe going to school could help. You could get out of Clovis, meet a new group of people. You can be _you_, the amazing man that I… the man that I met and became friends with."

Chris shook his head. "It's already July. It's too late."

"Maybe for the fall semester, but you still have time to apply for the spring."

"Where do you suggest I go?" Chris inquired with a grin, knowingly.

"I have no idea," Darren chuckled. "I mean, I hear Michigan has some pretty awesome schools, but I also hear the students there are kind of bizarre."

"I think," Chris began poking him in the side and Darren squirmed, "the students are fantastic."

"Yeah?"

"Oh, without a doubt!" Chris agreed.

"Hmm. Maybe I'll check into it."

"I can't believe I'm really doing this. Am I really thinking about applying to the same school that _you_ attend?"

"Hey! We can be roomies! You'll have an entire night's worth of experience after tonight."

"I still have to apply first, Dare."

"Technicalities," Darren made a wave with his hand. Chris started laughing. "What's so funny?"

"I'm just thinking about how my parents will react when they find out I'm applying to a school in Michigan. They don't even know about you."

"Maybe you should tell them."

"Tell them what? I met someone in San Francisco, hung out with him the _entire_ duration of my trip, and now I've decided to move in with him halfway across the country?"

"You don't have to put it _that_ way."

"How am I supposed to tell her about you? How am I supposed to explain what you are, what _we_ are, when I don't even know myself?"

"We're friends," Darren stated simply.

"Just friends?" Chris was a bit disappointed.

"We both know it's more than that." Darren sat up so he could see Chris a little better and Chris sat up with him. "I want you to be mine, but not until I'm sure I'm right for you."

"Darren-"

"No. I don't want to be the reason you choose to go to Michigan. I want you to look into other schools. I want you to choose the one you want because _you_ want it, not because I'm there. If you still choose Michigan in the end, and if we find our way back together and to each other, nothing would make me happier than to be your boyfriend."

"You want to be my boyfriend?" Chris knew he shouldn't have been quite so shocked, but he was. He'd never been able to express interest in a guy before, but here was Darren, wanting to give him everything.

"Of course I do."

"I promise I'll look into other schools, but I don't know how I could be happy anywhere you're not."

"I hope you do choose Michigan. That shouldn't be any secret." Darren leaned forward and kissed him again.

Chris hadn't experienced anything like kissing Darren. The cliché fireworks were not only going on around them, but also inside of him. It was a feeling he didn't want to give up; not tonight, not tomorrow when he had to leave; not ever.

"Come on. Let's go home and snuggle in bed while we watch a movie." Darren gathered up the blanket and cooler, took Chris' hand, and led him to the car.

* * *

**Well... is this what you wanted to happen? :)**


	4. Chapter 4

**Well, here's the last chapter! I hope you guys enjoy reading it as much as I enjoyed writing it :)**

* * *

"Can I come in?" Cerina's voice broke through the volume of the movie.

"It's open!" Darren called out.

Cerina walked in with a smile on her face. Darren could tell she sensed a change between him and Chris, like something had happened. Not only was it something a mother could easily pick up on, but it was also clear by the way they were situated at the head of Darren's bed.

They were on top of the covers, but Darren's blanket was carelessly slung over them, not quite covering their legs which were a mass of tangled limbs. Chris was wrapped up in Darren's arms with his head nestled in the crook of Darren's neck—a place he often found himself drawn to. Their free hands were intertwined, thumbs rubbing palms and fingers squeezing tight. Darren's face was buried in the hair atop Chris' head, taking in the scent of his shampoo and the feel of the soft hair against his stubbly chin.

Cerina smiled and let herself into the room. "I made up the couch for you, Chris, in case you want it. Just stay wherever is comfortable."

Chris didn't think he would be moving much more throughout the night. He was most comfortable in Darren's arms. "Thank you, Mrs. Criss."

"It's Cerina, dear." She set an extra blanket on the corner of Darren's bed. "I'll let the two of you be." She turned to leave. "Goodnight."

"Night, Mom."

When the door was closed again, Darren lifted Chris' chin up with his finger and leaned in for a kiss, testing his boundaries by allowing his tongue to run along Chris' lips. He felt Chris shudder and pulled away. "Sorry."

"Don't be. I like kissing you. I'm going to miss it."

"Way to ruin the mood," Darren joked, but his heart wasn't in it. It shattered into a million tiny shards every time Chris mentioned leaving, and he wasn't sure if it would ever really be hole again; at least not as long as he was separated from Chris.

"I'm sorry. We could kiss again," Chris suggested with a grin that Darren could only classify as a sexy smile.

"True, but this movie is getting pretty good." Darren gestured to the TV where The Cat in the Hat was playing.

"Dare, this movie is _horrible_," Chris judged.

"Don't talk bad about Dr. Seuss!"

"Just fucking kiss me, asshole."

"So damn dirty when you're turned on," Darren said as he leaned in.

Chris still couldn't get enough of Darren—his kisses, the warmth of his body, his company. After their first kiss, he felt the need for more. He felt wanted and attractive and _needed_ by another man for the first time in his life, and it was something that he craved. Chris still had trouble wrapping his mind around the fact that he'd only known Darren for a few days when it felt like an eternity.

Chris felt like their time was rushed. It was limited, and while he didn't want to push their boundaries too far, he wanted to leave San Francisco with absolutely no regrets and no "should have's" or "could have's."

Darren moved underneath him, and Chris settled between his legs. The movie was long forgotten, and his parents were in their own room on the other side of the house. The only sounds Chris could focus on were the groans occasionally coming from Darren as their tongues slid together.

Chris froze when their hips slotted together just enough for him to feel Darren hard beneath him. It only took Darren a second to realize what had happened and he quickly slid out from under Chris.

"I'm so sorry, Chris. I didn't mean to-"

Chris cut him off with a kiss. "It's okay. I… I-I'm not ready for that yet, but it doesn't mean you don't have the same effect on me."

Darren looked down at Chris' growing erection—clearly evident through his thin, cotton pajama pants—with wide eyes,

"We can go back to watching the movie if you want," Darren suggested, awkwardly

Chris moved back into his arms. "I wasn't kidding when I said the movie was horrible. It's one of the worse things I've seen."

Darren hummed in acknowledgment. The room was quiet for a few minutes apart from their unsteady breaths.

"Are you still going to talk to me once you leave tomorrow?" Darren asked with worry evident in his shaky voice.

Chris actually gasped because he couldn't imagine his world without Darren, no matter how he was able to fit into it. "Of course I will! I think I need you more than I even realize myself."

Darren signed in relief. "Good." He gave Chris another kiss—intense and passionate and not quite so chaste, but still quick. When he pulled away, he almost said something that would surely change everything, but he held the words in. They would only further complicate things for Chris.

"I need you, too, you know. It's a strange feeling because I've always been so independent, but maybe learning to give a part of myself to someone else to hold isn't such a bad idea."

"You're so cheesy sometimes."

Darren wanted to say it again, but somehow managed to keep it to himself. He pulled the two of them down so they were lying next to each other and pulled the comforter snuggly around them. "Goodnight, sweetheart."

Chris' eyes fluttered closed, and he pressed a wet, open-mouthed kiss to Darren's neck. " 'oodnight, love."

It wasn't those three little words that everyone died to hear, but it was enough to put a smile on Darren's face as he fell fast asleep.

XXX

Chris had been awake for a few minutes staring at the ceiling when he felt Darren press a kiss to his shoulder. "Go back to sleep," he groaned but turned his head to the side to capture Darren's lips.

"Good morning," Darren smiled.

"Goodnight," Chris replied and closed his eyes again.

Darren laughed," What's wrong?"

"If we wake up, I have to leave."

"I'm not going to kick you out at eight in the morning." Darren wound his arms tightly around Chris' waist. "In fact, I am going to keep you as long as I possibly can."

Chris snorted, "I have to leave eventually, Darren."

"But you could always prolong your visit," Darren suggested, a little hopeful.

Chris shook his head. "I can tell my mom is starting to worry, and Hannah keeps asking when I'm coming home. I was supposed to take her out so we could spend the day together, but I came here." Chris looked at Darren thoughtfully. "You know… you could always come back with me."

"Baby, I would love to, but your parents don't even know I exist. I don't want to make things worse for you in Clovis."

Chris sighed. He knew it was a stupid suggestion anyway. "They would love you, you know."

"How do you know that?" Darren questioned.

"Because," Chris squeezed Darren's arm, "you made their son happy."

Darren's only reply was to give him another kiss.

XXX

"So what are your plans for my last day in the city?" Chris asked curiously over breakfast. "Anything extravagant planned?"

Darren brushed his socked foot against Chris' under the table. "Wouldn't you like to know."

"Actually," Chris leaned closer to him and placed his hands on Darren's legs, their lips practically touching, "that is the reason I asked."

"Are you trying to seduce me in the middle of my kitchen? I didn't think you had it in you, Colfer!"

Chris slapped his arm and sat back in his chair. "Shut up, and tell me what we're doing."

Darren shrugged and took a bite of his French toast. "We'll do whatever you want to do."

"Good morning, boys," Cerina walked into the kitchen.

"Morning, Mom," Darren said through a full mouth.

"Darren, have some manners, please," Cerina warned sternly.

"He loves me just the way I am, don't you, sweetie?" Darren leaned forward with a smile.

"I…" Chris looked between Darren and his mom, unsure what to say.

"Kiss me," Darren whispered.

"Darren-" Chris began, hesitantly, but Darren cut him off with a kiss.

"Thank you," Darren smirked.

Chris looked towards Cerina, aware that she'd seen the entire exchange. However, he felt good about it, and she didn't seem to mind at all.

He rested his hand on Darren's knee and continued eating. It felt nice to finally be accepted, even if it took a road trip, an insomniac, and a whole love of courage to get there.

XXX

If Chris took the time to sit down and think about what was happening, he probably wouldn't believe it. He would think it was some kind of sick prank if not a complete dream. He wasn't the type to meet a guy, especially one like Darren, and be treated with genuine respect. But Darren _did_ treat him that way.

Chris still didn't understand the calming sensation that rushed over his body when Darren was around but maybe there wasn't logic or reason behind it. Darren made him _feel_. He felt comfortable. He felt wanted. He felt satisfied and understood and accepted.

Chris was never flirty, and not just because he was scared to be. He just didn't have it in him to open that part of himself up to someone else. He had never understood the way it felt to want to be so close to someone; not until he met Darren.

Chris was still hesitant when it came to kisses or touches, but he lost all control around Darren. Darren made him feel safe, like no matter how stupid or inexperienced and ridiculous he sounded, Darren still wanted him. He never felt judged by or disapproval from Darren, and that was one of the things he loved the most.

However, the thing that he had the hardest time understanding was how it was possible for him to fall in love in just three days.

XXX

After a breakfast of fruit and bagels, a quick shower for each of them, and a long debate between Chuck and Darren about what the must-see locations of San Francisco were, Chris climbed into the passenger's seat of his car and Darren slid behind the wheel.

They had tossed around various ideas for the day—The San Francisco Ballet, Golden Gate Park, various coffee shops, Chinatown—before they finally settled on the San Francisco Museum of Modern Art.

Darren pulled off into a parking lot a couple blocks away from the museum so they could avoid the heavy tourist traffic, and they walked the last few blocks to the museum. Their hands were linked and Darren occasionally kissed his cheek or let go just long enough to wrap an arm around Chris and pull him in for a tight hug.

Chris had never felt more free in his life. While there was still a risk of gaining someone's disapproval, he could easily walk down the street with the man he liked and not feel threatened. Walking the streets of San Francisco with Darren by his side was much more satisfying than the cautious walks he would take to and from the park back in Clovis. In San Francisco, he didn't have to look over his shoulder to make sure no one was going to jump out and attack him. He didn't have to worry about hiding the fact that he was gay. All he had to do was smile and enjoy the time he had left with Darren.

They finally approached the museum, and Darren pulled them inside. The air conditioning was refreshing after their walk in the summer heat.

They walked to the ticket booth and when Chris pulled his wallet out, Darren pushed it aside. "It's on me."

Chris looked up at the prices on the board above them. "Darren, it's eighteen dollars a ticket! I can get it myself."

Darren ignored him and turned to the employee behind the glass partition. "I'll take two tickets, please."

"That will be thirty-six dollars," the lady said, unenthusiastically.

Darren handed over the cash and received two tickets in return, one of which he handed to Chris.

"Darren, please let me pay you back," Chris nearly begged. He knew Darren's job at the music shop wasn't full time, so eighteen dollars couldn't have been an easy loss for him.

"I'm taking you out today. This is my city, and I'm going to show you a good time. Don't worry about it, okay?" Darren pecked him on the lips and pulled him towards the entrance.

Once inside, Darren strolled past the map of the museum, the employees ready to answer any questions, and the signs pointing out what galleries were which direction. He stopped in front of an elevator and pressed the up button.

"You know your way around this place," Chris stated. He looked around as they waited for the elevator doors to open. There were numerous tourists scurrying around, studying their fold out maps and looking around at the different signs. Chris was suddenly thankful he had a San Francisco native leading him around. It eliminated the hassle of trying to figure out where to go.

The elevator doors open and Chris stepped inside behind Darren.

"I'm going to take you to the roof first." Darren cradled Chris' face between his hands and pulled him forward for another kiss. "There's a little coffee bar I think you would enjoy."

"Coffee. Yes. Please," Chris groaned and leaned back against the wall.

A dinging sound rang through the small space and the elevator doors opened. They were greeted with bright San Franciscan sunlight and a wave of heat. The roof was beautiful. Not only did it over look the city, but there were plants, statues, and other various forms of artwork scattered about.

"Coffee's this way," Darren pointed towards an area with a few table and chairs Chris followed him over and looked up at the menu.

They patiently waited their turn in line, examining the menu in silence until they made it to the barista at the register. "Hi, I'd like a caramel macchiato, whatever this guy is having," he motioned towards Chris, "and throw in a Mondrian cake while you're at it."

Darren winked at the barista, and she blushed. Chris grinned when he felt Darren's hand close around his. He still wasn't fully convinced the he was there with Darren, a man who liked him not only as a friend, but as something more.

Chris stepped in front of Darren and felt a pair of arms wrapping around his waist. Darren kissed his cheek from behind and spoke into his ear, "Your turn to order, sweetie."

Chris tried to get his thoughts in order, but he had momentarily forgotten what it was he even wanted. Hell, he could barely even remember where they were. All he could think about was Darren. Darren's arms were wrapped around his waist. Darren's lips had kissed his cheek. Darren's breath was against his ear.

"Café mocha," he managed to mutter. His voice was a little too high, but he couldn't seem to control it.

"$12.79," the barista said, and Darren handed her the cash. "Keep the change," he winked again. Darren sure was a charmer.

"You can take your faggy selves somewhere else now and let me order," the man in line behind them said bitterly. He was most likely a tourist passing through the city.

Chris froze and made a move to leave Darren's arms, but Darren held him tight.

"Excuse me, but this is my city, and if I do leave, it's because I want to, not because you want me to." Darren picked up their drinks when they were set on the counter. "I hope my faggy breath hasn't spread some sort of decency on you. We wouldn't want that to happen. Have a nice day." Darren smiled a little too cheerfully and pulled Chris to a table.

Chris was silent for a few minutes. He had thought San Francisco was different. No one had said anything to them, and they had only received a few dirty looks; nothing he wasn't already used to.

"Are you okay?" Darren reached over and took his hand in a comforting way.

"I thought San Francisco was different. I thought I could be myself here."

"You can, Chris. I never want you to be anything less than yourself. There are ignorant assholes everywhere, but if you don't let them affect you, they'll give up. It's like a game to them, and if they don't have fun and get the response they want, they'll move on.

Chris nodded and smiled, but it didn't even reach the corners of his mouth. "I guess."

"Hey, look at me," Darren tugged on his hand and Chris met his eyes. "We are going to have a marvelous last day together. Unless you're uncomfortable, I'm going to continue holding your hand and kissing you whenever I want to, okay?" Chris nodded and Darren scooted his chair next to Chris'. He pulled Chris into his side and kissed his forehead. "Don't let them have their way. The worse they can do is throw useless words at you. I won't let them touch you, baby, I promise."

Chris nodded again and picked the corner of their cake and held it up for Darren to take. Darren smiled and kissed him again before doing the same for Chris.

Darren made him feel invincible in a world full of violence and pain. He didn't know what he was going to do once he returned to Clovis without him; without the magical shield that seemed to keep him alive.

XXX

They spend the next couple of hours wandering through the museum. Darren realized he had only taken a few pictures of Chris throughout the week—they were just photos of the two of them messing around—so he would occasionally snap a picture on his phone. Sometimes it would be of the two of them posing with a statue or in front of a bizarre painting, but more often than not, they were candids of Chris. Chris studying a portrait of an older man. Chris smiling affectionately at a little girl with strawberry blonde curls as she skipped past. Chris waving at a random elderly couple as they walked by.

Darren liked every part of Chris, of course, but this is what he liked the best. He liked capturing the moments that weren't intended to be remembered. He liked seeing Chris being himself—caring, selfless, happy, and seemingly _fearless_. Darren wanted to remember the Chris he had spent the past few days with. The one that smiled every time Darren spoke or judged him for the ridiculous things he did. He wanted to remember the Chris he had fallen in love with.

XXX

Their time in the museum lasted a little longer than either one of them had expected, but they didn't mind; after-all, the day was to be spent together, and what they did or where they were wasn't important.

By the time they walked back out into the street, dinner was approaching and both were starting to get hungry. Chris still didn't know much about San Francisco, so Darren offered to take him to one of his favorite restaurants. That's how they ended up in a nice little restaurant about twenty minutes later.

The restaurant was a place Darren frequented, so the owners knew him quite well. They knew him as Darren, the boy with the crazy hair and colorful socks who was overly friendly and a little wacky. They seemed to love him, though, and one short conversation with the older couple provided Chris with all the experience he needed to see why Darren loved it there so much.

They sat down at a two-person table in a quiet little corner. The room was dim, providing the perfect ambiance for a date, but it also doubled as a peaceful place one could go to escape from the world for a short time. Candles were placed in the center of the table to be lit upon request—Darren had grabbed a lighter and lit it himself—but as Chris looked around, he notice several people who chose to keep theirs unlit. There were families, couples, friends, and even a few people by themselves. Everyone seemed to have a different agenda, a different reason for visiting the little restaurant, but each guest was welcomed with the upmost respect.

Chris opened his menu and began moving his eyes across the items listed. As he did this, Darren couldn't take his eyes off of him. He didn't know what exactly he was feeling, but it was something more than he'd ever experienced before. His own menu remained closed in front of him, and he reached across to take Chris' hand. Chris lowered his menu and smiled back, neither one of them realizing their waiter had come to the table to take their order.

Once their food came, Darren hesitantly let go of Chris' hand so they could eat, but he still couldn't stop staring at Chris when the other man wasn't looking. He wondered how soon was too soon to actually tell him he loves him. They'd said it in so many words, but actually saying the three words was scary. He'd only known Chris for a few days. What if Chris thought he was crazy? What if this was just a summer fling for the other man? What if he thought Darren was lying because who could fall in love that quickly and know it was something real?

Darren chose to stay silent and listen as Chris rambled on and on about the amazing things they had done throughout the week, and the things he would never forget.

After their plates were cleared, the waiter took them away and returned with the single ice cream sundae they had ordered. Chris wasn't sure he'd seen one quite so large before, but he picked up a spoon and dug in.

Chris continued talking, and for once, Darren was strangely silent. He was silent not because he didn't have anything to add to the conversation, but because he didn't dare try to interrupt Chris. He loved hearing Chris talk. His voice was one of Darren's favorite sounds, whether they were singing along to the radio in the car or Chris was whispering in his ear as they cuddled up on the couch. Chris' voice was just one tiny part of what made Chris who he was, and Darren was sure there wasn't a single part he didn't love.

Chris paid for their dinner—Darren was being stubborn about it, but Chris took advantage of his brief bathroom break to pay—and they walked out onto the street after Darren said a quick goodbye to the owners. It was dark by the time they were finished, but the city was beautifully lit.

There were unspoken words in the air. There were thoughts of Chris leaving, and heartbreak that would be coming much too quickly. Rather than voicing what they both wanted to push aside for as long as possible, Darren led Chris to the music shop, knowing it could very well be the last time they would be there together.

Darren pulled Chris along and they walked down the street, hand in hand, trying their best to forget that they only had a short time left together. They tried, but they couldn't ignore the constant shouting in their heads. Chris leaned into Darren's side as they walked, and Darren wrapped his arms around Chris. He never wanted to leg to of him; wanted to be in Chris' embrace for the rest of his life.

XXX

"I have something for you," Darren picked his guitar up from where it sat near the counter and sat down on a chair in front of Chris.

Chris took a seat in the chair nearby and focused his attention on Darren. "Darren…"

"Remember that first night you came back and saw me singing something? I told you I was writing a song, but it was unfinished." Chris nodded. "Well, I had spent the entire day working on it. When there wasn't a customer or I wasn't on the phone with you, I would sit down with my guitar and work out melodies. You… somehow I was inspired after meeting you. It was like all of these melodies and rhythms were coming from a place inside of me that they'd never come before. It seems crazy when I actually put it into words, but I think for once, my heart took dominance over my brain."

Darren strummed a few lines on the guitar and tuned it up a bit. "I tried putting words to this, but nothing seemed to work. I spent so much time forcing the ideas in my head to leak out onto paper, out of my mouth, but I didn't get much more than a few lines. I scrapped every single lyric I wrote down. It wasn't until I was lying in bed last night with you in my arms, holding onto you with everything I had, that I realized some of the best things in this world don't need words. There are beautiful melodies in the greatest songs, but sometimes no one notices how powerful and moving they are until they're stripped down for you to hear.

"Something like this song, something that was written so much by what I feel when I'm with you, shouldn't have lyrics. The music itself should be able to express every single thought I've ever had. Maybe someone won't be able to understand the specifics, but that's not the point.

"I've spent a lot of my life searching for the meaning of songs, but I don't think there ever is one specific interpretation. I think every person feels something slightly different. This song I wrote might mean something completely different to you than it does to me, but it's something I want to share with you anyway. I snuck out last night to finish it because I wanted to play it for you before you left. It's something I want you to take with you when you leave in a few minutes."

Darren scooted his chair closer so that his knees were touching Chris' and their faces were inches apart. "I just want you to listen, okay?"

Chris nodded and let out a shaky breath. His eyes were misty and trained on Darren. As soon as Darren played the first few notes of the song, Chris broke down. Not only was it more beautiful than any song he'd ever heard before, but Darren had written it for him. He felt the emotions in the song, and every good thing he had ever experienced was twisted and spun into a song. The melodies were weaved together and formed a blanket of emotions that held him close while he let his tears fall from his eyes.

When Darren played the last few chords of the song, Chris noticed his eyes were filled with unshed tears as well. It only took them moving a few inches forward and Darren gently setting his guitar aside before Chris was on Darren's lap, kissing him fiercely and passionately before pulling away and diving in for the tightest hug he'd ever given anyone before.

A few minutes of silence passed before Chris allowed a couple inches to separate their bodies. "Thank you, Darren. It was beautiful."

Their foreheads were pressed together, and Darren tilted his head slightly to kiss the tip of Chris' nose. "I have one more thing for you, but I have to get up to get it."

Chris fell back into his own chair, and Darren slid behind the counter. He pulled a little box out of a drawer and returned to Chris. Inside was a chain which Darren held up for Chris to see, and on the end was a blue and yellow guitar pick.

"I know this is probably the cheesiest gift ever and my little speech will be stupid and embarrassing, but I wanted to give this to you anyway. I want you to wear this, or you don't even have to wear it at all of you don't want to. I mean, if you do you don't even have to make it noticeable. It can just be hidden underneath your shirt or you could shove it in a box and never look at it again." Darren paused when he realized he was rambling nervously. He took a deep breath and continued. "Chris, when things get hard for you, I want you to do one thing for me. I want you to go to your room and lie down on your bed. I want you to find this around your neck and hold onto it. I want you to imagine me laying there next to you. I want you to think about the life you have outside of Clovis. Clovis may seem like a humongous hole which you can't get out of, but to the rest of the world, it's just a pinpoint on the map. There are so many better places out there for you, and you'll make it to them one day. I know you will."

Darren stepped forward and brushed at the tears in the corners of Chris' eyes. He held Chris in his hands, keeping their eyes locked on each other as he leaned down for a kiss.

"I feel bad. I don't have anything for you." Chris looked away.

"Hey, you gave me more than you know. I've grown up and spent my entire life in this city. I've seen countless people and have done everything imaginable. But do you want to know something?" Chris looked back at Darren. "No week in my life has lived up to this week-the way I've felt, how happy I've been, how many memories I've made. Maybe I wasn't lost or upset or looking for a way out before you came here, but something was missing. And I found that something a few mornings ago. He showed up at this place soaking wet and a little angry. He wasn't too kind to me at first, but I understood. I've had rough nights too. But I took him in and gave him a chance, and he turned out to be the best friend I've ever had."

Chris laughed and wrapped his arms around Darren. "That guy is really glad he met you."

Darren closed his eyes and soaked in the warmth and smell of Chris for as long as he could. "It's getting late," he finally stated.

Chris nodded, but didn't pull away.

"I'll walk you to your car," Darren said softly.

Chris nodded again, but barely separated from Darren. "It's right outside." Darren had driven Chris' car back to the music shop before they had walked to the restaurant.

"I can still walk you there." Darren took Chris' hand and slowly moved towards the door.

The outside air was frigid, uncharacteristic of the normal San Franciscan summer. The wind was blowing violently and the streets were deserted. It reminded Chris of the way the city appeared to him when he first pulled into it—strange, eerie, and unfamiliar.

Darren stopped beside the driver's door and held up the necklace he'd given to Chris. "May I put this on you, so you can at least wear it on the way home? I don't care what you do with it once you get there, but at least I get to see it on you before you throw it away."

"Don't be silly," Chris turned around. "I'm never taking it off."

Darren circled his arms around Chris and clasped the necklace around his neck. Chris turned back around in Darren's arms and leaned forward for another kiss. It was a kiss unlike all others they'd shared. This particular kiss was meant to leave a lasting impression, one they would remember for days, weeks, months, maybe even years. There was no guarantee when or if they would ever see each other again, and their only hope was that this kiss would be the best they'd shared so far, but certainly not their last.

Chris began crying, his tears mixing with the single raindrop that fell from the sky.

"Call me when you get home?" Darren pleaded. "I don't care what time it is. I'll be up. I won't be able to sleep until I know you're safe."

"I'll never be safe in Clovis," Chris retorted.

"Chris, please," Darren begged.

Chris gazed into Darren's glassy eyes. The tears were streaming down his face by this point, and it only made Chris more reluctant to leave. "I promise."

Darren opened the car door, and it felt like the hardest thing he'd ever done before. Letting Chris get into his car and leave seemed wrong. It didn't seem like someone who managed to turn his life upside down should be able to walk away so easily, but he knew Chris had to.

Chris turned around and sat down inside the car, mechanically, almost like a robot. He was suddenly void of emotion, and Darren knew he was only trying to ignore the pain shooting through him.

"Bye, Darren," Chris whispered. He stared straight ahead, gripping his fingers around the steering wheel until they turned white.

"Goodbye, love." Darren closed the door and walked around the front of the car before stopping on the sidewalk. He heard Chris turn the car on, and less than ten seconds later the car was pulling away from the curb.

As the car pulled away, hundreds of images flashed in front of his eyes. Chris dripping wet outside of the music shop. Chris walking into Darren's room after taking a shower—his hair wet, his face flushed, his eyes wide and bright. The way Chris' eyebrows raised slightly as he sipped his coffee, and the way he scrunched his nose when it was a little too bitter. The way Chris looked at him when they pulled away from a kiss and how peaceful he looked when he was sleeping. Chris practically glowing in the sunlight, shining even brighter than anything Darren had ever seen before. He saw Chris hugging him tightly. He saw him running happily through the streets and looking free, something Darren knew he had never felt before. He saw the smile that meant the world to him, and the boy who had a piece of his heart.

Darren thought about running after him. He thought about stopping the car and begging Chris to stay. He thought about telling Chris he could stay at their house for the rest of the summer, and he could move into a Michigan apartment with Darren in the fall. He thought about every way he could get Chris to stay, but in the end, his feet remained planted in the cement.

Darren watched Chris' car get smaller and smaller as he drove into the distance until it finally rounded a corner and disappeared. Darren suddenly felt empty, like a part of him was in the car, moving farther and farther away from him without any idea if it would ever return.

He stood on the sidewalk and let his tears continue to fall. Only thirty seconds had passed before it started raining, but Darren didn't have the desire to move. Rain reminded him of Chris. It reminded him of the night that changed his life for the better, and he wasn't quite sure the pain he was feeling would ever go away.

XXX

It was a little over a month later—and many, many phone calls—when Darren got the surprise of his life. He was messing with a violin one morning around 2:15 when he heard a quiet knock on the front door of the music shop.

Darren's face instantly lit up, his heart stopped, and his breath caught in his lungs when he saw a familiar face outside the door. He ran as fast as he could, stumbling over a display of CDs and knocking them to the floor. He ignored the crash that followed and yanked the door open, pulling Chris into his arms and frantically kissing him.

"What are you doing here?"

Chris shrugged. "I couldn't sleep, so I drove to San Francisco." He made it seem as if driving over three hours to a completely different city was as simple as stating his name to a stranger. "Plus," he added, "I got a rather important envelope in the mail today and thought you might want to be there when I opened it." Chris brought his hands out from behind his back and Darren's face lit up when he saw the familiar University of Michigan logo.

"Is that…"

"My acceptance slash rejection letter?" Chris nodded. "Yup. Ready to find out if I'm finally getting out of Clovis and going to school with this guy I'm sort of crazy about during his last semester there?"

"Don't forget grad school. I would never let you come for me if I was only going to be there for one more semester."

"I would go anyway," Chris said, determined.

"This is it. This will tell me if I have a roommate or not?" Darren began bouncing like a little kid on Christmas morning.

"You don't want me to move in even If I'll be uneducated and unemployed?" Chris feigned shock and disappointment.

"Just open the damn envelope," Darren snapped, but a grin immediately followed.

Darren moved to Chris' side and wrapped an arm around his waist, pulling him close. Chris delicately tore the envelope open and pulled out the leaf of paper. He unfolded it and felt Darren's breath catch in his throat as he read the words along with him. Before Chris had a chance to say anything, the letter was abandoned on the floor, landing aimlessly against a trumpet case, and Darren's warm lips were on his, hugging him so tight Chris thought he might break.

"You're going to school in fucking Michigan, Chris! I fucking love you, do you know that?" Chris laughed at first, but then Darren's words sank in. Darren was suddenly looking at him as if he were the most beautiful thing he'd ever seen, and to Darren, he was. "I love you, Chris," he said again, quieter and much more sincere.

"I love you, too, Dare." The words rolled off of Chris' tongue as if they'd been said a thousand times before, and the truth was he _had _said them. He said them to himself almost every day, but never to the man they were meant for. All of the weeks of biting his tongue, all of the phone calls when he wanted to blurt out those three little words, every time he got a silly text from Darren which only heightened his awareness of his feelings for his best friend. Those were the times when Chris could barely keep everything inside. However, somehow he managed to, and seeing Darren in person, watching his reaction and being able to have his arms wrapped around him, was worth the wait.

"I leave for Michigan in three days. Are you ready to move? Do you want to come with me this weekend? Do you want to be my roommate? Do you want to-"

"Darren, sweetie, calm down. We still have an entire semester before I can start." Chris pushed a few of Darren's stray curls out of his face.

"But will you be my roommate?"

"I would be honored to live at the palace de Criss."

"More like shack de Criss," Darren snorted.

"As long as I still get the prince, I don't care where I live," Chris beamed.

Darren grinned back and led Chris out into the streets of San Francisco where it all began, taking him for another walk through the dark night, the first of many, many more to come.

* * *

**Thank you to everyone who has taken the time to review so far.**

**I hope you're happy with the way things turned out! The ending gives you closure, but also allows you to imagine the future you want for them as well.**

**Reivew and let me know what you think of it now that it's over? :)**


End file.
